Humility. It’s one of those things I didn’t really understand the point of when I was younger. But with age and time I learned how important it was for me to stay sharp, to keep moving forward in life, to be kinder and to not create problems for myself by thinking I was better and smarter than I actually was. That's what I've gained from that sobering humility. But today I’d like to share not only the impact it has had on my own life but also the best quotes I have found about humility. The top timeless thoughts about staying humble and not getting lost in pride or arrogance but to stay grounded in humility and reality. And if you want more motivation to keep your feet on the ground and yourself happy then also have a look at this post about empathy and also this post filled with quotes about inner peace . Humility Quotes About Life, Happiness and Success “Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it's thinking of yourself less.” C. S. Lewis “Stay hungry, stay young, stay foolish, stay curious, and above all, stay humble because just when you think you got all the answers, is the moment when some bitter twist of fate in the universe will remind you that you very much don't.” Tom Hiddleston “Never look down on anybody unless you're helping them up.” Jesse Jackson “Thank you” is the best prayer that anyone could say. I say that one a lot. Thank you expresses extreme gratitude, humility, understanding.” Alice Walker “It is unwise to be too sure of one's own wisdom. It is healthy to be reminded that the strongest might weaken and the wisest might err.” Mahatma Gandhi “There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self.” Ernest Hemingway “Humility is really important because it keeps you fresh and new.” Steven Tyler “A great man is always willing to be little.” Ralph Waldo Emerson “Just knowing you don't have the answers is a recipe for humility, openness, acceptance, forgiveness, and an eagerness to learn – and those are all good things.” Dick Van Dyke “Success is a lousy teacher. It seduces smart people into thinking they can’t lose.” Bill Gates “Have more humility. Remember you don't know the limits of your own abilities. Successful or not, if you keep pushing beyond yourself, you will enrich your own life–and maybe even please a few strangers.” A.L. Kennedy “Humility will open more doors than arrogance ever will.” Zig Ziglar “The greatest lesson in life is to know that even fools are right sometimes.” Winston S. Churchill “I have three precious things which I hold fast and prize. The first is gentleness; the second is frugality; the third is humility, which keeps me from putting myself before others. Be gentle and you can be bold; be frugal and you can be liberal; avoid putting yourself before others and you can become a leader among men.” Lao Tzu “If pain doesn't lead to humility, you have wasted your suffering.” Katerina Stoykova Klemer “I always say be humble but be firm. Humility and openness are the key to success without compromising your beliefs.” George Hickenlooper “Real genius is nothing else but the supernatural virtue of humility in the domain of thought.” Simone Weil “There are times when wisdom cannot be found in the chambers of parliament or the halls of academia but at the unpretentious setting of the kitchen table.” E.A. Bucchianeri “Selflessness is humility. Humility and freedom go hand in hand. Only a humble person can be free.” Jeff Wilson “Perhaps wisdom…is realizing how small I am, and unwise, and how far I have yet to go.” Anthony Bourdain “To learn which questions are unanswerable, and not to answer them: this skill is most needful in times of stress and darkness.” Ursula K. Le Guin “The greatest friend of truth is Time, her greatest enemy is Prejudice, and her constant companion is Humility.” Charles Caleb Colton “Humility is the true key to success. Successful people lose their way at times. They often embrace and overindulge from the fruits of success. Humility halts this arrogance and self-indulging trap. Humble people share the credit and wealth, remaining focused and hungry to continue the journey of success.” Rick Pitino “Humility, I have learned, must never be confused with meekness. Humility is being open to the ideas of others.” Simon Sinek “Keep your eyes on the stars and your feet on the ground.” Theodore Roosevelt “Humility is to make a right estimate of one's self.” Charles Spurgeon “Mastery begins with humility.” Robin Sharma “There is a universal respect and even admiration for those who are humble and simple by nature, and who have absolute confidence in all human beings irrespective of their social status.” Nelson Mandela “I believe that the first test of a great man is his humility. I don't mean by humility, doubt of his power. But really great men have a curious feeling that the greatness is not of them, but through them. And they see something divine in every other man and are endlessly, foolishly, incredibly merciful.” John Ruskin “A grateful heart is a beginning of greatness. It is an expression of humility. It is a foundation for the development of such virtues as prayer, faith, courage, contentment, happiness, love, and well-being.” James E. Faust “Humility is attentive patience.” Simone Weil “True humility is intelligent self respect which keeps us from thinking too highly or too meanly of ourselves. It makes us modest by reminding us how far we have come short of what we can be.” Ralph W. Sockman “The road must be trod, but it will be very hard. And neither strength nor wisdom will carry us far upon it. This quest may be attempted by the weak with as much hope as the strong. Yet it is oft the course of deeds that move the wheels of the world: Small hands do them because they must, while the eyes of the great are elsewhere.” J.R.R. Tolkien “Every person that you meet knows something you don't; learn from them.” H. Jackson Brown Jr. “Live a life full of humility, gratitude, intellectual curiosity, and never stop learning.” Gza “Without humility there can be no humanity.” John Buchan “The humble listen to their brothers and sisters because they assume they have something to learn. They are open to correction, and they become wiser through it.” Thomas Dubay “There is beauty and humility in imperfection.” Guillermo del Toro “True knowledge exists in knowing that you know nothing.” Socrates “Life is a long lesson in humility.” J.M. Barrie “There is strange comfort in knowing that no matter what happens today, the Sun will rise again tomorrow.” Aaron Lauritsen You may also want to have a look at this post with quotes about regret . Funny Humility Quotes “In the course of my life, I have often had to eat my words, and I must confess that I have always found it a wholesome diet.” Winston Churchill “The proud man can learn humility, but he will be proud of it.” Mignon McLaughlin “If anyone tells you that a certain person speaks ill of you, do not make excuses about what is said of you but answer, “He was ignorant of my other faults, else he would not have mentioned these alone.” Epictetus “Flattery is all right so long as you don’t inhale.” Adlai Stevenson “Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.” Ann Landers “I shall not commit the fashionable stupidity of regarding everything I cannot explain as a fraud.” Carl Jung “A true genius admits that he/she knows nothing.” Albert Einstein “There are two kinds of egotists: Those who admit it, and the rest of us.” Laurence J. Peter “Just remember, when someone has an accent, it means that he knows one more language than you do.” Sidney Sheldon “Whenever the world throws rose petals at you, which thrill and seduce the ego, beware. The cosmic banana peel is suddenly going to appear underfoot to make sure you don’t take it all too seriously, that you don’t fill up on junk food.” Anne Lamott “On the highest throne in the world, we still sit only on our own bottom.” Michel de Montaigne Quotes About Kindness, Pride and Humility “Pride makes us artificial and humility makes us real.” Thomas Merton “A man should never be ashamed to own that he has been in the wrong, which is but saying in other words that he is wiser today than he was yesterday.” Alexander Pope “Humility is nothing but truth, and pride is nothing but lying.” St. Vincent de Paul “With pride, there are many curses. With humility, there come many blessings.” Ezra Taft Benson “Humility is throwing oneself away in complete concentration on something or someone else.” Madeleine L'Engle “As long as you are proud you cannot know God. A proud man is always looking down on thing and people: and, of course, as long as you are looking down you cannot see something that is above you.” C.S. Lewis “I realize today that nothing in the world is more distasteful to a man than to take the path that leads to himself.” Hermann Hesse “The first test of a truly great man is his humility. By humility I don't mean doubt of his powers or hesitation in speaking his opinion, but merely an understanding of the relationship of what he can say and what he can do.” John Ruskin “Do you wish to rise? Begin by descending. You plan a tower that will pierce the clouds? Lay first the foundation of humility.” Saint Augustine “A little humility goes a long way.” Dean Ornish “There are two things that men should never weary of, goodness and humility; we get none too much of them in this rough world among cold, proud people.” Robert Louis Stevenson “As you grow up, always tell the truth, do no harm to others, and don't think you are the most important being on earth. Rich or poor, you then can look anyone in the eye and say, ‘I'm probably no better than you, but I'm certainly your equal.” Harper Lee “Avoid having your ego so close to your position that when your position falls, your ego goes with it.” Colin Powell “Power is dangerous unless you have humility.” Richard J. Daley “It was pride that changed angels into devils; it is humility that makes men as angels.” Augustine of Hippo “We are all apprentices in a craft where no one ever becomes a master.” Ernest Hemingway “It’s important that what thoughts you are feeding into your mind because your thoughts create your belief and experiences. You have positive thoughts and you have negative ones too. Nurture your mind with positive thoughts: kindness, empathy, compassion, peace, love, joy, humility, generosity, etc. The more you feed your mind with positive thoughts, the more you can attract great things into your life.” Roy T. Bennett “Those who travel to mountain-tops are half in love with themselves, and half in love with oblivion.” Robert Macfarlane “It is together that we will be able to save our biodiversity. This is a principle of effectiveness. But it is also a principle of humility; none of us can act alone.” Albert II, Prince of Monaco “While differing widely in the various little bits we know, in our infinite ignorance we are all equal.” Karl R. Popper “It is not for me to judge another man's life. I must judge, I must choose, I must spurn, purely for myself. For myself, alone.” Herman Hesse “Humility, that low, sweet root, from which all heavenly virtues shoot.” Thomas Moore Want even more? Check out this post with compassion quotes and also this one with quotes on giving .

“A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.” Winston Churchill Optimism. It can turn a situation that looks negative or bleak into an opportunity or something to learn from. It can replace the draining thoughts of pessimism with something that will create more positive energy and enthusiasm again. And it can help you to jump over obstacles, to keep moving when you fall or stumble and to not give up just because you have had a couple of temporary setbacks. So not just adding more of it to your own life but to the lives of the people in your world too is a good idea. Because in the long run you tend to get what you give . And in the short run, well, you get to enjoy the smiles when you create and spread that positive energy. Plus, you’ll boost your own self-esteem when you feel you are doing the right thing. Here are 10 simple tips that can help you to get started with that. 1. Play music with positive energy. Uplifting music is of course a great way to boost your own mood and open up new perspectives again. You can do the same for people around you. Put on a really positive song when you are hanging out. Or send them an uplifting playlist for Spotify or a similar service. 2. Just be there for someone. Listen and lend the optimistic and grounded perspective to someone in your life in need of it. At first I find it best to just the let other person vent, to let him or her get issue at hand out into the light. So I am just there fully and listening. Oftentimes this might be enough. Because just being there will help him or her to let the emotional tension out and to analyze the issue and to find a solution or to let it go. If she or he gets stuck in negative thinking or in making a mountain out of a molehill then it can be helpful to add your own perspective to ground him or her and to help shift perspective on the situation. To make him or her see that if you zoom out then things aren't that bad really. And together the two of you might be able to find a solution or a first step that he or she can put into action. 3. Take 30-60 seconds to give a genuine compliment. Think about one thing that makes the other person tick. A small or bigger passion. Or something good that people too often take for granted about him or her. And then give a compliment about that. It often means more than you might guess. 4. Smile. A smile puts you and the people around you into a better and more relaxed headspace. It works even when you don’t feel that much like smiling. If you like, do a brief experiment. Force a smile for 30 seconds or a minute if you are feeling a bit negative and see what happens to your mood. 5. Hide a secret note. Take 60 seconds out of your day to write and hide a note with a compliment. Or some encouraging words . Or make it a note of thankfulness. Hide it under their pillow, in the lunch box or wallet or perhaps the book he or she is reading at this time. 6. Help someone to wind down. Being busy with work or school can over time add a lot of tension and stress. And that can certainly get in the way of optimistic and constructive thinking. So help someone in your life to wind down. Suggest going for a picnic. Just have fun and perhaps go for swim in the nearby lake or ocean. Then lie together in silence on the blanket and watch the clouds go by for a while. A break like this can do wonders for the mood and perspective for the both of you. 7. Cook or bring their favorite food. If she's having a bad day then cook her favorite meal. Or get her favorite takeout food. Or maybe just a small treat, like a piece of the chocolate or the special cupcake she loves the most. 8. Hug. A hug is, perhaps often even more than a smile, something that can make someone feel a little better and a bit safer again. Use it when appropriate of course. But don’t underestimate the effect of it and how that little nudge can turn someone’s thoughts around towards something brighter and more positive again. 9. Share what you've found or made. It could delicious fruit that you've picked. Or the jam, cookies or bread you made. Or fish you've smoked or the beef you made jerky out of. Such a simple but loving gift can really mean a lot and add positive energy to someone's whole week or month. 10. Pay it forward. If someone in your life adds a bit of optimism and positive energy to your life then don’t just return it somewhere down the line. Pay it forward to someone else too. And together build a growing upward spiral of optimism, encouragement and compassionate kindness .

Lost love and heartbreak is a tough thing. It can drag you down. Take time to move on from. And hold you back from a brighter future for far too long. So in this post I’d like to share the most helpful quotes on lost love and on how to move on from it and into a new chapter in your life. And if you need more motivation then you may find these quotes on regret and this post with compassion quotes helpful . Quotes About Lost Love “'Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.” Alfred Lord Tennyson “Love is never lost. If not reciprocated, it will flow back and soften and purify the heart.” Washington Irving “The way to love anything is to realize that it may be lost.” Gilbert K. Chesterton “When you have your heart broken for the first time, you gain depth.” Sienna Miller “Suddenly she realized that what she was regretting was not the lost past but the lost future, not what had not been but what would never be.” F. Scott Fitzgerald “There are things that we never want to let go of, people we never want to leave behind. But keep in mind that letting go isn’t the end of the world, it’s the beginning of a new life.” Unknown “When it’s gone, you’ll know what a gift love was. You’ll suffer like this. So, go back and fight to keep it.” Ian McEwan “You never lose by loving. You always lose by holding back.” Barbara De Angelis “When we think we have been hurt by someone in the past, we build up defenses to protect ourselves from being hurt in the future. So the fearful past causes a fearful future and the past and future become one. We cannot love when we feel fear…. When we release the fearful past and forgive everyone, we will experience total love and oneness with all.” Gerald G. Jampolsky “I have loved and I have lost and I'm starting to believe; it's okay. Sometimes what we ‘think' is best for us, is only the beginning of what is truly ‘meant' for us. And if I have loved, so deeply the wrong heart; I am content in knowing the greatest love I will ever experience, hasn't even begun yet.” Nikki Rowe “Love never dies a natural death. It dies because we don't know how to replenish its source. It dies of blindness and errors and betrayals. It dies of illness and wounds; it dies of weariness, of witherings, of tarnishings.” Anais Nin “I don’t know that love changes. People change. Circumstances change.” Nicholas Sparks “I don’t think, until you’ve actually lost somebody you really love, that you can go through that door that allows you to be grown-up.” Felicity Kendal “I think the worst feeling in the world is knowing that someone you used to talk to everyday doesn't care about you anymore.” Anmol Andore “You must be strong enough to know that love will come to you when you are ready. You must be strong enough to know when to say goodbye, and know that letting go is not weak.” Marisa Donnelly “Sadly enough, the most painful goodbyes are the ones that are left unsaid and never explained.” Jonathan Harnisch “Perhaps that is where our choice lies—in determining how we will meet the inevitable end of things, and how we will greet each new beginning.” Elana K. Arnold “The hottest love has the coldest end.” Socrates “When you loved someone and had to let them go, there will always be that small part of yourself that whispers, “What was it that you wanted and why didn't you fight for it?” Shannon L. Alder “Where you used to be, there is a hole in the world, which I find myself constantly walking around in the daytime, and falling in at night. I miss you like hell.” Edna St. Vincent Millay “To love and win is the best thing; to love and lose, the next best.” William Thackeray “Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation.” Kahlil Gibran “Not all those who wander are lost.” J.R.R. Tolkien “Let go. Why do you cling to pain? There is nothing you can do about the wrongs of yesterday. It is not yours to judge. Why hold on to the very thing which keeps you from hope and love?” Leo Buscaglia Also check out this post on inner peace for more helpful tips . Quotes About Moving on From Lost Love “Don’t cry because it’s over. Smile because it happened.” Dr. Seuss “People should not judge failed love affairs as failed experiences, but as part of the growth process. Something does not have to end well for it to have been one of the most valuable experiences of a lifetime.” Ethel Person “A broken heart is just the growing pains necessary so that you can love more completely when the real thing comes along.” J.S.B. Morse “If you spend your time hoping someone will suffer the consequences for what they did to your heart, then you’re allowing them to hurt you a second time in your mind.” Shannon L. Alder “No matter how hard the past is, you can always begin again.” Buddha “When two people decide to get a divorce, it isn't a sign that they ‘don't understand' one another, but a sign that they have, at last, begun to.” Helen Rowland “Life moves forward. The old leaves wither, die and fall away, and the new growth extends forward into the light.” Bryant McGill “I was never one to patiently pick up broken fragments and glue them together again and tell myself that the mended whole was as good as new. What is broken is broken—and I'd rather remember it as it was at its best than mend it and see the broken places as long as I lived.” Margaret Mitchell “Celebrate endings—for they precede new beginnings.” Jonathan Lockwood Huie “Laughter gives us distance. It allows us to step back from an event, deal with it and then move on.” Bob Newhart “It happens to everyone as they grow up. You find out who you are and what you want, and then you realize that people you’ve known forever don’t see things the way you do. So you keep the wonderful memories, but find yourself moving on.” Nicholas Sparks “The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that the situation is over, you cannot move forward.” Steve Maraboli “There comes a day when you realize turning the page is the best feeling in the world, because you realize there's so much more to the book than the page you were stuck on.” Zayn Malik “When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.” Alexander Graham Bell “When we go back in to the past and rake up all the troubles we've had, we end up reeling and staggering through life. Stability and peace of mind come by living in the moment.” Pam W. Vredevelt “People have a hard time letting go of their suffering. Out of a fear of the unknown, they prefer suffering that is familiar.” Thich Nhat Hanh “If one dream should fall and break into a thousand pieces, never be afraid to pick one of those pieces up and begin again.” Flavia Weedn “The most difficult aspect of moving on is accepting that the other person already did.” Faraaz Kazi “Some of us think holding on makes us strong, but sometimes it is letting go.” Hermann Hesse “Your past does not equal your future.” Anthony Robbins Want even more? Have a look at this post with quotes on overcoming adversity .

“Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.” Buddha There is only one time and place where you can be and have any control over. The present moment. But most of us still spend a lot of our regular days lost in memories, reliving a sunny vacation or maybe more commonly repeating an old conflict or negative situation over and over in our thoughts . Or we get lost in scenarios about what could happen in the future. Maybe through wishful daydreams. Or maybe by building monsters in our minds as thoughts go round and and round and create scary and dangerous mountains out of molehills or just air. Or your thoughts may become split and unfocused between several different things and tasks. If you spend a lot of your everyday moments and time in the future or the past or you have difficulty focusing and you feel this may have a negative effect on your life then maybe you want to learn to live more in the present moment. Here’s what works for me to do that. Just a few simple things that I use in my normal day. 1. Single-task not only your work. I and many others have often written and talked about the importance of single-tasking your work to get it done more effectively. I have found that it becomes easier for me to stay present for more time throughout my day if I single-task everything as best I can. That means to not use tabs when I browse the internet but to just be fully engaged with one thing online at a time. It means to not use my smartphone or my computer as I also try to watch the TV. Or to use any of those internet-devices during a conversation. Get a good start to your day and set the tone for it by doing one thing at a time as soon as you wake up. If you have to multitask, then try to set off some specific time for it during your day. Maybe an hour or so in the afternoon. 2. Do it slowly. When you wake up and starting doing your first thing of the day, then slow it down a bit. Do it and the next few things at a relaxed and calm pace. It will probably not take that much longer than if you do it quickly. And you’ll be able to stay present more easily, to focus on each thing you do and to find a simple joy or stillness in it . Do that instead of increasing your stress right away and getting stuck in worries or though loops about what may happen today before you even have had your breakfast. And as you move through your day, try to do it slowly when you can. 3. Tell yourself: now I am… As I do something I simply tell myself this in my mind: Now I am X. For example, if I am brushing my teeth, then I tell myself: Now I am brushing my teeth. This habit is maybe most important when doing things where it is easy to drift away to the future or past. It could be when you brush your hair or teeth or when you are taking a walk to the supermarket. I don’t tell myself this line all the time, but I pepper it in a couple of times throughout my day. 4. Minimize what you let into your head early in the day. If I check the email, Facebook and other websites online early in the day then I have found that I will have more thoughts bouncing around in my head. And so it becomes a lot harder to concentrate on anything, to stay present and to not be dragged away into some negative thought loop. So the kind option towards myself has become to not check anything early in the day. And to check things as few times as I can. If I minimize such things then my day becomes lighter and simpler and I not only stay present more easily but I also tend to get more things of importance done. 5. No, no, no + reconnect with the here and now. The four tips above make it easier to stay in the present moment and to use it and enjoy it fully. But each day I still drift into the past or the future. Or my thoughts become split between different things. If you have read any of my stuff on self-esteem then you know that I often use a stop-word or phrase to quickly disrupt and stop the inner critic or a damaging train of thought . I do the same thing here. As quickly as I notice that my thoughts have drifted away I say to myself: No, no, no. Then I quickly follow that up with focusing on just my breathing or just on what is happening around me right now with all my senses for a minute or two to draw myself back into this present moment.

A simple thought or quote can send your mind off in a new direction. It can be the simple start of a positive change in your life and in how you think about things. So in this post I’d like to share the most thought-provoking quotes on perspective that I’ve found over the past decade and a half. You’ll for instance learn: Why sorrow and pain can be something that will bring you more joy in the long run. That if you want a change in your world then that starts with you and what you focus on. How to reduce the worrying in your life. If you want more motivation and timeless thoughts that will send your mind off on new and unexplored pathways then check out this post with quotes about empathy and also this one that’s all about finding inner peace . Thought-Provoking Quotes About Perspective “We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are.” Anaïs Nin “There are no facts, only interpretations.” Friedrich Nietzsche “The only thing you sometimes have control over is perspective. You don't have control over your situation. But you have a choice about how you view it.” Chris Pine “Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. The fearful are caught as often as the bold.” Helen Keller “Empathy begins with understanding life from another person's perspective. Nobody has an objective experience of reality. It's all through our own individual prisms.” Sterling K. Brown “Often it isn't the mountains ahead that wear you out, it's the little pebble in your shoe.” Muhammad Ali “Distance not only gives nostalgia, but perspective, and maybe objectivity.” Robert Morgan “The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain. Is not the cup that holds your wine the very cup that was burned in the potter’s oven? And is not the lute that soothes your spirit, the very wood that was hollowed with knives? When you are joyous, look deep into your heart and you shall find it is only that which has given you sorrow that is giving you joy. When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see in truth that you are weeping for that which has been your delight.” Kahlil Gibran “Every form of art is another way of seeing the world. Another perspective, another window. And science –that’s the most spectacular window of all. You can see the entire universe from there.” Claudia Gray “Gratitude is one of the strongest and most transformative states of being. It shifts your perspective from lack to abundance and allows you to focus on the good in your life, which in turn pulls more goodness into your reality.” Jen Sincero “If you look the right way, you can see that the whole world is a garden.” Frances Hodgson Burnett “Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.” Confucious “A little perspective, like a little humor, goes a long way.” Allen Klein “Because one believes in oneself, one doesn't try to convince others. Because one is content with oneself, one doesn't need others' approval. Because one accepts oneself, the whole world accepts him or her.” Lao Tzu “If we don’t have a sense of humor, we lack a sense of perspective.” Wayne Thiebaud “What we do see depends mainly on what we look for. … In the same field the farmer will notice the crop, the geologists the fossils, botanists the flowers, artists the colouring, sportmen the cover for the game. Though we may all look at the same things, it does not all follow that we should see them.” John Lubbock “We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorns have roses.” Alphonse Karr “Life is not a problem to be solved, but a reality to be experienced.”’ Soren Kierkegaard “Maxim for life: You get treated in life the way you teach people to treat you.” Wayne Dyer “It is a narrow mind which cannot look at a subject from various points of view.” George Eliot “It is entirely possible that behind the perception of our senses, worlds are hidden of which we are unaware.” Albert Einstein “Never mistake motion for action.” Ernest Hemingway “No man has the right to dictate what other men should perceive, create or produce, but all should be encouraged to reveal themselves, their perceptions and emotions, and to build confidence in the creative spirit.” Ansel Adams “If the only tool you have is a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail.” Abraham Maslow “It suddenly struck me that that tiny pea, pretty and blue, was the Earth. I put up my thumb and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth. I didn't feel like a giant. I felt very, very small.” Neil Armstrong “While there is perhaps a province in which the photograph can tell us nothing more than what we see with our own eyes, there is another in which it proves to us how little our eyes permit us to see.” Dorothea Lange “Only in quiet waters do things mirror themselves undistorted. Only in a quiet mind is adequate perception of the world.” Hans Margolius “If we are always arriving and departing, it is also true that we are eternally anchored. One's destination is never a place but rather a new way of looking at things.” Henry Miller “Though I might travel afar, I will meet only what I carry with me, for every man is a mirror. We see only ourselves reflected in those around us. Their attitudes and actions are only a reflection of our own. The whole world and its condition has its counterparts within us all. Turn the gaze inward. Correct yourself and your world will change.” Kristen Zambucka You may also find this post with quotes about regret helpful . Inspiring Quotes on Changing Perspective “It is not he who reviles or strikes you who insults you, but your opinion that these things are insulting.” Epictetus “In all affairs it's a healthy thing now and then to hang a question mark on the things you have long taken for granted.” Bertrand Russell “Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.” Anaïs Nin “Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile, but sometimes your smile can be the source of your joy.” Thich Nhat Hanh “Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.” C.G. Jung “To change ourselves effectively, we first had to change our perceptions.” Stephen R. Covey “Every man has his secret sorrows which the world knows not; and often times we call a man cold when he is only sad.” Henry Wadsworth Longfellow “It's been my experience that you can nearly always enjoy things if you make up your mind firmly that you will.” L.M. Montgomery “It's not only moving that creates new starting points. Sometimes all it takes is a subtle shift in perspective, an opening of the mind, an intentional pause and reset, or a new route to start to see new options and new possibilities.” Kristin Armstrong “I never think of myself as an icon. What is in other people’s minds is not in my mind. I just do my thing.” Audrey Hepburn “On a deeper level you are already complete. When you realize that, there is a playful, joyous energy behind what you do.” Eckhart Tolle “Try not to become a person of success, but rather try to become a person of value.” Albert Einstein “There is a huge amount of freedom that comes to you when you take nothing personally.” Don Miguel Ruiz “If you are not willing to risk the usual, you will have to settle for the ordinary.” Jim Rohn “One of the best pieces of advice I ever got was from a horse master. He told me to go slow to go fast. I think that applies to everything in life. We live as though there aren't enough hours in the day but if we do each thing calmly and carefully we will get it done quicker and with much less stress.” Viggo Mortensen “We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.” George Bernard Shaw “One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one’s work is terribly important.” Bertrand Russell “Much of the stress that people feel doesn’t come from having too much to do. It comes from not finishing what they started.” David Allen “If we climb high enough, we will reach a height from which tragedy ceases to look tragic.” Irvin D. Yalom “What people in the world think of you is really none of your business.” Martha Graham Positive Perspective Quotes “If you think you can do a thing or think you can't do a thing, you're right.” Henry Ford “Just one small positive thought in the morning can change your whole day.” Dalai Lama “Perspective is everything when you are experiencing the challenges of life.” Joni Eareckson Tada “When I look back on all these worries, I remember the story of the old man who said on his deathbed that he had had a lot of trouble in his life, most of which had never happened.” Winston Churchill “As human beings, our greatness lies not so much in being able to remake the world – that is the myth of the atomic age – as in being able to remake ourselves.” Mahatma Gandhi “When you wake up every day, you have two choices. You can either be positive or negative; an optimist or a pessimist. I choose to be an optimist. It's all a matter of perspective.” Harvey Mackay “Perhaps they are not stars, but rather openings in heaven where the love of our lost ones pours through and shines down upon us to let us know they are happy.” Eskimo Proverb “I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness for it shows me the stars.” Og Mandino “I am still determined to be cheerful and to be happy in whatever situation. I may be, for I have also learnt from experience that the greater part of our happiness or misery depends upon our dispositions and not upon our circumstances.” Martha Washington “When we long for life without difficulties, remind us that oaks grow strong in contrary winds and diamonds are made under pressure.” Peter Marshall “Time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time.” Marthe Troly-Curtin “If men would consider not so much wherein they differ, as wherein they agree, there would be far less of uncharitableness and angry feeling in the world.” Joseph Addison “There is strange comfort in knowing that no matter what happens today, the Sun will rise again tomorrow.” Aaron Lauritsen “Life is 10 percent what you make it and 90 percent how you take it.” Irving Berlin “If you believe it will work out, you’ll see opportunities. If you believe it won’t, you will see obstacles.” Wayne Dyer “Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did so. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” Mark Twain Want even more? You can find a in-depth collection of quotes on compassion here .

“The distance is nothing; it is only the first step that is difficult.” Madame Marie du Deffand “What is not started today is never finished tomorrow.” Johann Wolfgang von Goethe “Never give up on a dream just because of the time it will take to accomplish it. The time will pass anyway.” Earl Nightingale Maybe the most common issue people have with personal development and making a positive change is that it stays a daydream. That they get excited and inspired. But then as those positive emotions fade nothing really happens. Life continues as usual. Your health, finances or your relationship with yourself stays the same. It's very frustrating. I know. I used to read about personal development in pretty much all important areas of life. But it probably took me months or years to get going with making any of those positive changes. Why? It was uncomfortable. Making the changes felt so big that is was easier to just kept dreaming about it as frustration built up within. So what can you do if you get stuck in daydreams? The best solution I've found for starting to make your dreams into reality is to go smaller. Because grand changes and huge ambitions sound so inspiring and motivating. But they're also scary. So the most important step to get started and to keep going, especially when you are new to personal development, is to remove as much pressure and expectations as you can. That's at least what has worked and still works best for me. And in this article I’ll share how to do that in two simple ways. 1. Go for just taking a small step. I have mentioned this many times. With good reason. It's one of the most effective ways to reduce the pressure and the expectations you may put on yourself and to start moving out of standing still or procrastination. Now, taking just one small step and focusing on that is for instance a great way to become productive at school or at work. But it can be used in just about any area in life. If you want to become: Kinder and improve your relationships then just take one small step by giving someone a genuine compliment. A better listener then have just one conversation today where you focus as much effort as you can on learning more about the person in front of you. And truly be there as best as you can and nowhere else in your mind. Someone with a less cluttered home then start by taking 5 minutes to unclutter one shelf in your bookcase or a drawer in your desk. If you like, then tomorrow you can take the same small action and just focus on that. If you want to take a first step and get started with something then do it today. Someday so easily becomes never or at least a day several months or years into the future. Don’t make that mistake . And if the first small step you come up with still seems too big to take then think of an even smaller step. Be kind to yourself in this way and make the start as easy on yourself as you can. 2. Go for just taking care of today. When you feel overwhelmed, tired and just want to quit or relapse into your old and more negative habits then sit down for a minute. Breathe. Then narrow your focus greatly. Don’t look forward because then you’ll see all the things you have to do to reach your goal or to create a new habit. Instead, go smaller and focus on just taking care of today. Nothing more. Tomorrow will come in time. And then you will take care of that today too. I highly recommend keeping this narrow focus a daily thing. Sure, you may have to do some planning. Do that early in the week or day. Then shrink your focus again to make your work and life lighter and more effortless. Focus on just the small steps and on today and soon you will have traveled quite a distance.

It’s easy to get stuck in thinking about what you can get. And to put less focus on what you can give (even though studies have shown that the joy of giving lasts the longest ). So this week I’d like to share the top giving quotes of all time. In this post you’ll learn: Why it's absolutely essential for success (both for you and others) to be focusing on giving before focusing on what you may yourself receive. What the most important thing that you can give is (it’s not money). How giving back helps us all to rise up. And if you want even more inspiration then have a look at this post with quotes about empathy and also this one that can help you to handle regret . Now, let’s get started. Inspirational and Thought-Provoking Quotes About Giving “Since you get more joy out of giving joy to others, you should put a good deal of thought into the happiness that you are able to give.” Eleanor Roosevelt “No one has ever become poor by giving.” Anne Frank “The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.” Mahatma Gandhi “Presents are made for the pleasure of who gives them, not the merits of who receives them.” Carlos Ruiz Zafón “The value of a man resides in what he gives and not in what he is capable of receiving.” Albert Einstein “You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give.” Kahlil Gibran “You can give without loving, but you cannot love without giving.” Amy Carmichael “Whatever you think people are withholding from you–praise, appreciation, assistance, loving care, and so on–give it to them.” Eckhart Tolle “The meaning of life is to find your gift. The purpose of life is to give it away.” Pablo Picasso “Life’s most persistent and urgent question is, What are you doing for others?” Martin Luther King, Jr. “Money is like manure; it's not worth a thing unless it's spread around encouraging young things to grow.” Thornton Wilder “Remember that the happiest people are not those getting more, but those giving more.” H. Jackson Brown Jr. “It's not how much we give but how much love we put into giving.” Mother Theresa “As you grow older, you will discover that you have two hands — one for helping yourself, the other for helping others.” Audrey Hepburn “You get the best out of others when you give the best of yourself.” Harvey Firestone “Those who are happiest are those who do the most for others.” Booker T. Washington “Giving is better than receiving because giving starts the receiving process.” Jim Rohn “The smallest act of kindness is worth more than the grandest intention.” Oscar Wilde “There's no bad consequence to loving fully, with all your heart. You always gain by giving love.” Reese Witherspoon “There are those who give with joy, and that joy is their reward.” Khalil Gibran “The human contribution is the essential ingredient. It is only in the giving of oneself to others that we truly live.” Ethyl Percy Andrus “The unselfish effort to bring cheer to others will be the beginning of a happier life for ourselves.” Helen Keller “If nature has made you for a giver, your hands are born open, and so is your heart; and though there may be times when your hands are empty, your heart is always full, and you can give things out of that—warm things, kind things, sweet things—help and comfort and laughter—and sometimes gay, kind laughter is the best help of all.” Frances Hodgson Burnett “You cannot receive what you don't give. Outflow determines inflow.” Eckhart Tolle “The best thing to do with the best things in life is to give them away.” Dorothy Day “To give your best is to receive the best.” Raymond Holliwell “The most truly generous persons are those who give silently without hope of praise or reward.” Carol Ryrie Brink “No one is useless in this world who lightens the burdens of another.” Charles Dickens “Love grows by giving. The love we give away is the only love we keep. The only way to retain love is to give it away.” Elbert Hubbard “Don’t expect to receive if you’re not willing to give.” Unknown “The greatest good you can do for another is not just share your riches, but reveal to them their own.” Disraeli “Your days are numbered. Use them to throw open the windows of your soul to the sun. If you do not, the sun will soon set, and you with it.” Marcus Aurelius You may also want to have a look at this post with quotes about inner peace . Quotes About Giving Back “It is every man’s obligation to put back into the world at least the equivalent of what he takes out of it.” Albert Einstein “At the end of the day it’s not about what you have or even what you’ve accomplished… it’s about who you’ve lifted up, who you’ve made better. It’s about what you’ve given back.” Denzel Washington “We make a living by what we get. We make a life by what we give.” Winston Churchhill “If you have much, give of your wealth; If you have little, give of your heart” Arab proverb “Only by giving are you able to receive more than you already have.” Jim Rohn “We must give more in order to get more. It is the generous giving of ourselves that produces the generous harvest.” Orison Swett Marden “Love only grows by sharing. You can only have more for yourself by giving it away to others.” Brian Tracy “When you learn, teach. When you get, give.” Maya Angelou “What does one person give to another? He gives of himself, of the most precious he has, he gives of his life. This does not necessarily mean that he sacrifices his life for the other—but that he gives him of that which is alive in him; he gives him of his joy, of his interest, of his understanding, of his knowledge, of his humor, of his sadness—of all expressions and manifestations of that which is alive in him. In thus giving of his life, he enriches the other person, he enhances the other's sense of aliveness by enhancing his own sense of aliveness. He does not give in order to receive; giving is in itself exquisite joy. But in giving he cannot help bringing something to life in the other person, and this which is brought to life reflects back to him.” Erich Fromm “You cannot hold on to anything good. You must be continually giving – and getting. You cannot hold on to your seed. You must sow it – and reap anew. You cannot hold on to riches. You must use them and get other riches in return.” Robert Collier “A kind gesture can reach a wound that only compassion can heal.” Steve Maraboli “Service to others is the rent you pay for your room here on Earth.” Muhammad Ali “Think of giving not as a duty but as a privilege.” John D. Rockefeller Jr. “I’ve learned that you shouldn’t go through life with a catcher’s mitt on both hands. You need to be able to throw something back.” Maya Angelou “To do more for the world than the world does for you – that is success.” Henry Ford “I don't think you ever stop giving. I really don't. I think it's an on-going process. And it's not just about being able to write a check. It's being able to touch somebody's life.” Oprah Winfrey “Real generosity toward the future lies in giving all to the present.” Albert Camus “Giving is not just about making a donation. It is about making a difference.” Kathy Calvin “You may not have saved a lot of money in your life, but if you have saved a lot of heartaches for other folks, you are a pretty rich man.” Seth Parker “For it is in giving that we receive.” St. Francis of Assisi “There is a wonderful mythical law of nature that the three things we crave most in life — happiness, freedom, and peace of mind — are always attained by giving them to someone else.” Peyton Conway March “Your own self-realization is the greatest service you can render the world.” Ramana Maharshi “I have found that among its other benefits, giving liberates the soul of the giver.” Maya Angelou “We rise by lifting others.” Robert Ingersoll “He who serves the most, reaps the most.” Jim Rohn

BY DAVID MORGAN MAY 28, 2020 / 3:20 PM / CBS NEWS With theatres around the world closed due to the coronavirus pandemic , international film festivals have joined together virtually, with We Are One: A Global Film Festival , kicking off May 29 on YouTube. The 10-day festival will screen more than 100 films — for free — including world and North American premieres. The lineup ranges from narrative features, documentaries and short films, to recorded panel discussions with leading filmmakers, and virtual reality presentations. Films will be streamed at youtube.com/WeAreOne .

“You wouldn’t worry so much about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do.” Eleanor Roosevelt “When you say “yes” to others, make sure you aren’t saying “no” to yourself.” Paulo Coehlo When you get stuck in the habit of being a people pleaser then that can have a sneaky and negative effect. Not only on you but also on the people around you. Because as you try to please the other people in your life: You put on a mask and try to guess what to do while getting anxious and stressed. You sometimes feel taken advantage off by others who use your people pleasing habit and you often feel out of tune with what you yourself deep down want. It can also have an unintended effect on other people as they may see through your mask, start to feel your inner discomfort and stress themselves and get confused or upset because they sense you are not being honest and straightforward with them. So trying to please others pretty much all the time is often an even worse choice that one may at first think. But how can you change this behavior and stop being a people pleaser? This week I’d like to share 7 powerful insights and habits that have helped me with that. 1. Realize that with some people it isn’t about you and what you do (no matter what you do). Some people just can’t be pleased. No matter what you do. Because it’s not about what you do or do not do. It’s about him or her. About how she’s having a bad month, a sick pet or doesn’t have a good chemistry with you. Or about him being in an unhappy marriage, in too much debt or having a tooth ache that just won’t stop. By realizing this and how you in the end can’t get everyone to like you or avoid conflict no matter what you do you can start to let go of this ineffective and damaging habit. 2. Learn how to say no. When you like to please then it’s of course hard to say no. But it is vital for you own happiness, stress-levels and for living the life you truly want. Here are 5 things that have made it easier for me to say no more often: Disarm and state your need. It's easier for people to accept your no if you disarm them first. Do that by, for instance, saying that you’re flattered or that you appreciate the kind offer. Then add that you, for example, simply don’t have the time for doing what they want. If they’re pushy, add how you feel. Say that you don’t feel that this offer is a good fit for your life right now. Or that you feel overwhelmed and very busy and so you cannot do whatever they want. Telling someone how you honestly feel can help them to understand your side of the issue better. And it’s also a lot harder to argue with how you feel rather than what you think. Help out a bit. If possible, finish your reply with recommending someone that you think could help out or would be a better fit for what they need. I do this quite often when I feel I lack the knowledge or experience that a reader or a friend is looking for. Remind yourself why it is important to sometimes say no: You teach people by how you behave. They learn about you and your boundaries from your behavior. So if you stand up for yourself and say no and are assertive about what you don’t want then people will start to pick up on that. And over time you’ll encounter fewer and fewer situations where someone tries to be pushy or steamroll you. It’s OK to feel a bit guilty about saying no (but you don’t have to act on it). Just feel it and be with that feeling for a while. But at the same time know that it doesn’t mean that you have to act on it and say yes or do what they want you to do. 3. Reminder: People don’t really care that much about what you say or do. Holding yourself back in life and trying to act in a way that is pleasing to others can, in my experience, to a large part come from a belief that people care a great deal about what you say or do. But the truth is that while you may be the main character in your own life and head you’re not that in other people’s lives. Because here’s the thing: people have their hands full with thinking and worrying about their own lives. They have their heads full with thoughts about their kids, career, pets, hobbies, dreams and worries or thoughts about what others may think of them. This realization can make you feel less important. But it can also set you free. 4. Learn how to handle criticism and verbal lash outs (and the fear of that). Tip #1 in this article is one thing that’ll help you to handle criticism and the fear of it. Because sometimes it’s simply about the other person and his or her situation in life right now and not about what you did or did not do. A few more things that help me to handle negative or critical messages are: Wait before you reply. Take a couple of deep breaths in a conversation or a few minutes if you’re in front of your inbox. By doing so you’ll reduce the risk of lashing out yourself or making a mistake. Calming yourself down a bit before replying is pretty much always a good idea. Remember: you can let it go. You don’t have to reply to all the negative messages you may get via email, social media or in real life. You can just say nothing, let it go and move on. This does of course not work in every situation but it’s important to remember that you from time to time do have this option. It’s OK to disagree. This took me time to really get. Because I wanted to get people to my side. To make someone see things the way I did. But it’s also OK to simply have different opinions about things. And to leave it at that. I found that life became lighter and simpler when I started to accept this idea and perspective. 5. Set boundaries for yourself. If you say no to yourself, if you set a few firm boundaries for yourself then it will over time become easier to do the same towards other people too. And these boundaries can also help you to focus better on what matters the most to you. A couple of my daily ones that have helped me with both of those things are: A start-time and a stop-time for work. I don’t work before 8 in the morning and my work computer is shut off – at the latest – at 7 in the evening. Work in a no-distraction zone. I keep email notifications and messaging programs off. And my smart phone is on silent mode at the other end of our home. Only check email once a day. Otherwise it’s easy for me to lose focus and to have too many thoughts swirling around in my mind while working. 6. Strengthen your self-esteem. Why’s this important? Well, with a self-esteem toolbox filled with helpful habits you’ll value yourself and therefore your time and energy more and so it’s becomes more natural to say no when you need to. And criticism and negative words will bounce off of you more easily and often. Plus, you’ll be less concerned about getting everyone else to like you all the time. Because now you like and respect yourself more and your dependency upon what others may think or say drops drastically. 7. Keep your focus on what YOU want out of your life. If you know what’s most important to you and you keep your focus on that each day then you’ll naturally start to say no and stop being so people pleasing. Because now your energy and time is mostly focused on your needs and wants. You’re not just drifting along anymore without a clear focus (which is great because when you lack that then it’s easy to fall into the trap of just going along with what someone else wants). So how do you do this practically? Well, fine-tuning what you deep down want might take some time. But a good start is this… Step 1: Ask yourself: what’s the top 3 most important things in my life right now? It could be your small business. Your family. Your career, health, dog, photography hobby, soccer, improving your social life or simplifying your home. Or something else. Step 2: Create 1-3 reminders. Write down your top 3 most important things on a small piece of paper. And put it on your bedside table so you see it first thing every morning. You can also create 1-2 more notes with the same answers to for instance put on your fridge and in your workspace. An effective alternative to paper notes is to use a reminder app on your smart phone (I use the free Google Keep app for my reminders every day). These two simple steps have helped me a lot to keep my priorities straight and to remind myself of them every day so I don’t start to drift too much from what matters the most to me.

This is a collection of the best regret quotes of all time. So if you want to learn how to… Deal with regret in a healthier way. Overcome your regret and even use it to your advantage. …then you're in the right place. These thoughts from the past 2000 years will help you to not be held back by your past but create a better today and a happier and more successful future. And if you want more timeless advice for when you're having a tough time then have a look at this post with Wednesday quotes to help you power through the rest of the week and this one filled with quotes on inner peace . Helpful, Motivating and Thought-Provoking Quotes About Regret “One of the greatest regrets in life is being what others would want you to be, rather than being yourself.” Shannon L. Alder “I'd rather regret the things I've done than regret the things I haven't done.” Lucille Ball “We must all suffer one of two things: the pain of discipline or the pain of regret or disappointment.” Jim Rohn “Always do your best. Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse and regret.” Don Miguel Ruiz “Make the most of your regrets; never smother your sorrow, but tend and cherish it till it comes to have a separate and integral interest. To regret deeply is to live afresh.” Henry David Thoreau “At the end of your life, you will never regret not having passed one more test, not winning one more verdict or not closing one more deal. You will regret time not spent with a husband, a friend, a child, or a parent.” Barbara Bush “When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.” Alexander Graham Bell “There are two kinds of guilt: the kind that drowns you until you’re useless, and the kind that fires your soul to purpose.” Sabaa Tahir “First, imagine taking the potentially regret – producing path of inaction. Then imagine what the very best outcome would be were you to take this risk. By picturing both scenarios in advance, you can avoid the regret of what might have been.” Wayne Dyer “Of all the words of mice and men, the saddest are, “It might have been.” Kurt Vonnegut “If you live long enough, you'll make mistakes. But if you learn from them, you'll be a better person. It's how you handle adversity, not how it affects you. The main thing is never quit, never quit, never quit.” Bill Clinton “I often regret that I have spoken; never that I have been silent.” Publilius Syrus “Regret is an odd emotion because it comes only upon reflection. Regret lacks immediacy, and so its power seldom influences events when it could do some good.” William O'Rourke “If you aren't in the moment, you are either looking forward to uncertainty, or back to pain and regret.” Jim Carrey “We all make mistakes, have struggles, and even regret things in our past. But you are not your mistakes, you are not your struggles, and you are here NOW with the power to shape your day and your future.” Steve Maraboli “We should regret our mistakes and learn from them, but never carry them forward into the future with us.” Lucy Maud Montgomery “Remorse is the poison of life.” Charlotte Bronte “A man has cause for regret only when he sows and no one reaps.” Charles Goodyear “Do not brood over your past mistakes and failures as this will only fill your mind with grief, regret and depression. Do not repeat them in the future.” Swami Sivananda “A man is not old until regrets take the place of dreams.” John Barrymore “I put my career in second place throughout both my marriages and it suffered. I don't regret it. You make choices. If you want a good marriage, you must pay attention to that. If you want to be independent, go ahead. You can't have it all.” Lauren Bacall “Reflect upon your present blessings, of which every man has many-not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some.” Charles Dickens “It's better to look ahead and prepare, than to look back and regret.” Jackie Joyner-Kersee “If I'm sincere today, what does it matter if I regret it tomorrow?” José Saramago “Often regret is very false and displaced, and imagines the past to be totally other than it was.” John O'Donohue “Don't regret your mistakes. You'll always make mistakes. The better you are, the less mistakes you make. The only way to get better is to thoroughly analyze your mistakes.” James Altucher “Regret is mostly caused by not having done anything.” Charles Bukowski “Maybe all one can do is hope to end up with the right regrets.” Arthur Miller “Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable.” Sydney J. Harris “Don't allow yourself to become one who, nearing death, regrets what you might have done if only you had taken a few risks. We each have a purpose in life.” Gillian Stokes “Nobody gets to live life backward. Look ahead, that is where your future lies.” Ann Landers You may also want to have a look at these thought-provoking quotes about empathy . Quotes About Living with Regret “I made decisions that I regret, and I took them as learning experiences… I'm human, not perfect, like anybody else.” Queen Latifah “Living with regrets was like driving a car that only moved in reverse.” Jodi Picoult “Regret is the worst human emotion. If you took another road, you might have fallen off a cliff. I'm content.” William Shatner “Make it a rule of life never to regret and never to look back. Regret is an appalling waste of energy; you can't build on it; it's only good for wallowing in.” Katherine Mansfield “Never regret. If it's good, it's wonderful. If it's bad, it's experience.” Victoria Holt “Never regret anything you have done with a sincere affection; nothing is lost that is born of the heart.” Basil Rathbone “The past is a great place and I don't want to erase it or to regret it, but I don't want to be its prisoner either.” Mick Jagger “Life is too short, time is too precious, and the stakes are too high to dwell on what might have been.” Hillary Clinton “‘Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.” Alfred Lord Tennyson “The feelings that hurt most, the emotions that sting most, are those that are absurd – The longing for impossible things, precisely because they are impossible; nostalgia for what never was; the desire for what could have been; regret over not being someone else; dissatisfaction with the world’s existence. All these half-tones of the soul’s consciousness create in us a painful landscape, an eternal sunset of what we are.” Fernando Pessoa “Looking back, I have this to regret, that too often when I loved, I did not say so.” Ray Stannard Baker “When we grow old, there can only be one regret – not to have given enough of ourselves.” Eleonora Duse “They say you should not suffer through the past. You should be able to wear it like a loose garment, take it off and let it drop.” Eva Jessye “I don't regret what I've been through. I've had ups and downs, super highs and some really low lows. I've been so blessed that I could never say, ‘I wish this didn't happen.' It's part of who I am. There's nothing in my life that's so ugh.” Jennifer Lopez “Heartbreak could be lived with if it weren't accompanied by regret.” Laura Kasischke “One doesn't recognize the really important moments in one's life until it's too late.” Agatha Christie “We all do things we desperately wish we could undo. Those regrets just become part of who we are, along with everything else. To spend time trying to change that, well, it's like chasing clouds.” Libba Bray “My advice to other disabled people would be, concentrate on things your disability doesn't prevent you doing well, and don't regret the things it interferes with. Don't be disabled in spirit as well as physically.” Stephen Hawking “Looking back, I have this to regret, that too often when I loved, I did not say so.” David Grayson “The only calibration that counts is how much heart people invest, how much they ignore their fears of being hurt or caught out or humiliated. And the only thing people regret is that they didn't live boldly enough, that they didn't invest enough heart, didn't love enough. Nothing else really counts at all.” Ted Hughes “Regrets only apply when we don't learn from a situation. No sense looking back, look forward with new knowledge and no regret.” Catherine Pulsifer “The bitterest tears shed over graves are for words left unsaid and deeds left undone.” Harriet Beecher Stowe “I always try to do as much as I can do. I'm never a person that does not enough, because I'd regret not doing enough and think I probably could have done more. I probably go too far and have to reel myself back in, which works in some things, and other things it doesn't work.” Tom Brady “I'm living with every step. I can't live with regret. The past is the past. I'm not worried about it. I can't change it. I can't fix it. It is what it is. I'm just living.” Ryan Sheckler

“Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.” Confucius This article is about a few mistakes I've made. About a few destructive habits that can make life quite messy and unhappy. And it's about what you can do instead to replace those mistakes and habits with something better. This article is all about uncovering simplicity if you find yourself having overcomplicated your life. 1. Stop overthinking things. Few habits and mistakes are as common as getting stuck in overthinking. I used to do it all the time. And it led to a lot of analysis paralysis, to little action being taken on what I deep down wanted and to so much time and energy wasted. What to do instead: Set short deadlines. When you have all the time in the world to consider something then that can often wind up in you spending a lot of time thinking about the situation at hand from every conceivable angle. I have found that learning to set short deadlines is really helpful for this, although it take a bit to practice. So for small decisions like if should go and do the dishes or go and work out I usually give myself 30 seconds or less to make a decision. For somewhat larger decisions that in the past would have taken me days or weeks to think through I set a deadline for 30 minutes or for the end of the workday. Say stop in a situation where you know you can't think straight. I know that I'm more vulnerable to negative thinking and overthinking things when I'm hungry or when I'm close to my bedtime. And so I have learned to stay away from thinking about anything important during that time. And if such thoughts with a negative twist still pop up then I tell myself: No, no, we're not going to think about this now. Because I know that I will be back to thinking clearly and optimistically again if I just get some food or sleep. I highly recommend finding your own situation(s) when you are more vulnerable to overthinking or pessimism. And to catch yourself and redirect your thoughts at such times. 2. Stop making your daily work busier and more complicated than it needs to be. It's very easy to get stuck in the same old rut at work or in school. To spend your hours there like you usually do and like most of the other people do too. With a lot of time spent on busy work, procrastination and on being stressed on weekends or just before a deadline. What to do instead: Breathe and find what truly matters in the long run. First, sit down and take a couple of deep breaths to relax and to focus your mind. Then ask yourself: what is the most important thing I can do today? Think about what would matter most in the long run when you ask yourself this question. Find just that one task. Get started with that one task. If you have trouble taking action and are slipping into procrastination then go smaller. Tell yourself: I will work on this task for just 2 minutes. Make getting started so easy on yourself that there is very little or no inner resistance in your mind. Because if you just get started then it's in my experience pretty easy to keep going for a while longer and to make a real dent in the task or even completing it. 3. Stop overcomplicating your relationships. The fun, excitement and joy in a relationship of any kind can often be greatly reduced by simple and common thought mistakes. Two such mistakes I've made too often in the past are to try to read minds and to go full in with creating drama. What to do instead: Ask. Trying to mindread usually winds up in creating nightmare scenarios in your own mind. Because reading minds is pretty much impossible and so it is very easy to project your own worst fears onto what this person might be thinking. So instead start cultivating a habit of being a bit more direct. Cultivate a habit of asking and more clearly communicating to better understand each other. Question your own drama. There can be a sort of temporary pleasure or excitement in creating drama and making something bigger or more negative than it is. In the short run and even more so in the long run it tends to be quite destructive though . So start questioning your own drama. Ask yourself: Will this matter in 5 years? Or even in 5 weeks? Ask it before you start creating and spreading drama to the people in your life. Sure, the issue at hand may still have to be addressed but simplify it to what it truly is before you do that to avoid unnecessary conflicts, anger and hurt feelings. And don’t forget to question other people’s drama too by asking yourself the same question. Just because they want to create drama doesn’t mean that you have to get drawn into it.

Empathy. Such an often underrated but important part of life. So in this post I’d like to share the best quotes on empathy I’ve found. Timeless thoughts that can help us to grow our emotional intelligence and become more compassionate. To improve and deepen our relationships with and understanding of others. And to help us create a more loving and kind world. I hope you'll find these thoughts as helpful and inspiring as I have. And if you want more inspiration then check out this post with quotes on overcoming adversity and this one filled with thoughts on inner peace . 67 Uplifting and Motivating Empathy Quotes “Don’t criticize what you don’t understand, son. You never walked in that man’s shoes.” Elvis Presley “Self-absorption in all its forms kills empathy, let alone compassion. When we focus on ourselves, our world contracts as our problems and preoccupations loom large. But when we focus on others, our world expands. Our own problems drift to the periphery of the mind and so seem smaller, and we increase our capacity for connection – or compassionate action.” Daniel Goleman “Empathy is seeing with the eyes of another, listening with the ears of another and feeling with the heart of another.” Alfred Adler “Opinion is really the lowest form of human knowledge. It requires no accountability, no understanding. The highest form of knowledge… is empathy, for it requires us to suspend our egos and live in another’s world. It requires profound purpose larger than the self kind of understanding.” Bill Bullard “Empathy grows as we learn.” Alice Miller “Sometimes all a person wants is an empathetic ear; all he or she needs is to talk it out. Just offering a listening ear and an understanding heart for his or her suffering can be a big comfort.” Roy T. Bennett “Whenever you are about to find fault with someone, ask yourself the following question: What fault of mine most nearly resembles the one I am about to criticize?” Marcus Aurelius “One friend, one person who is truly understanding, who takes the trouble to listen to us as we consider a problem, can change our whole outlook on the world.” E. H. Mayoli “We think we listen, but very rarely do we listen with real understanding, true empathy. Yet listening, of this very special kind, is one of the most potent forces for change that I know.” Carl Rogers “The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.” Elisabeth Kübler-Ross “Resolve to be tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and tolerant of the weak and the wrong. Sometime in life you will have been all of these.” George Washington Carver “I think we all have empathy. We may not have enough courage to display it.” Maya Angelou “The opposite of anger is not calmness. It’s empathy.” Mehmet Oz “We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak.” Epictetus “Empathy is about standing in someone else's shoes, feeling with his or her heart, seeing with his or her eyes. Not only is empathy hard to outsource and automate, but it makes the world a better place.” Daniel H. Pink “Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain but it takes character and self-control to be understanding and forgiving.” Dale Carnegie “Vulnerability is the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy, and creativity. It is the source of hope, empathy, accountability, and authenticity. If we want greater clarity in our purpose or deeper and more meaningful spiritual lives, vulnerability is the path.” Brené Brown “Never look down on anybody unless you’re helping him up.” Jesse Jackson “You can only understand people if you feel them in yourself.” John Steinbeck “There is no small act of kindness. Every compassionate act makes large the world.” Mary Anne Radmacher “You cannot do a kindness too soon, for you never know when it will be too late.” Ralph Waldo Emerson “Whenever you feel like criticizing any one…just remember that all the people in this world haven't had the advantages that you've had.” F. Scott Fitzgerald “If there is any one secret of success, it lies in the ability to get the other person’s point of view and see things from his angle as well as your own. ” Henry Ford “Humans aren't as good as we should be in our capacity to empathize with feelings and thoughts of others, be they humans or other animals on Earth. So maybe part of our formal education should be training in empathy. Imagine how different the world would be if, in fact, that were ‘reading, writing, arithmetic, empathy.'” Neil deGrasse Tyson “Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.” Leo Buscaglia “We judge what we don’t understand.” Unknown “When I get ready to talk to people, I spend two thirds of the time thinking what they want to hear and one third thinking about what I want to say.” Abraham Lincoln “No one cares how much you know, until they know how much you care” Theodore Roosevelt “Yet, taught by time, my heart has learned to glow for other’s good, and melt at other’s woe.” Homer “You think your pain and your heartbreak are unprecedented in the history of the world, but then you read. It was books that taught me that the things that tormented me most were the very things that connected me with all the people who were alive, who had ever been alive.” James Baldwin “Reading is an exercise in empathy; an exercise in walking in someone else's shoes for a while.” Malorie Blackman “Empathy may be the single most important quality that must be nurtured to give peace a fighting chance.” Arundhati Ray “Criticism, like rain, should be gentle enough to nourish a man’s growth without destroying his roots.” Frank A. Clark “It's the hardest thing in the world to go on being aware of someone else's pain.” Pat Barker “You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.” Buddha “Some people think only intellect counts: knowing how to solve problems, knowing how to get by, knowing how to identify an advantage and seize it. But the functions of intellect are insufficient without courage, love, friendship, compassion, and empathy.” Dean Koontz “When you start to develop your powers of empathy and imagination, the whole world opens up to you.” Susan Sarandon “The death of human empathy is one of the earliest and most telling signs of a culture about to fall into barbarism.” Hannah Arendt “Learning to stand in somebody else’s shoes, to see through their eyes, that’s how peace begins. And it’s up to you to make that happen. Empathy is a quality of character that can change the world.” Barack Obama “Leadership is about empathy. It is about having the ability to relate to and connect with people for the purpose of inspiring and empowering their lives.” Oprah Winfrey “Empathy begins with understanding life from another person's perspective. Nobody has an objective experience of reality. It's all through our own individual prisms.” Sterling K. Brown “When people talk, listen completely. Most people never listen.” Ernest Hemingway “When we judge or criticize another person, it says nothing about that person; it merely says something about our own need to be critical.” Unknown “Empathy is simply listening, holding space, withholding judgment, emotionally connecting, and communicating that incredibly healing message of you’re not alone.” Brené Brown “It’s not so much the journey that’s important; as is the way that we treat those we encounter and those around us, along the way.” Jeremy Aldana “Compassion, empathy, and love are the real pillars we need to build within ourselves to become human.” Loknath “We must learn to regard people less in the light of what they do or omit to do, and more in the light of what they suffer.” Dietrich Bonhoeffer “I believe empathy is the most essential quality of civilization.” Roger Ebert “There is no greater loan than a sympathetic ear.” Frank Tyger “Empathy is about finding echoes of another person in yourself.” Mohsin Hamid “As we tell stories about the lives of others, we learn how to imagine what another creature might feel in response to various events. At the same time, we identify with the other creature and learn something about ourselves.” Martha C. Nussbaum “We need very strong ears to hear ourselves judged frankly, and because there are few who can endure frank criticism without being stung by it, those who venture to criticize us perform a remarkable act of friendship, for to undertake to wound or offend a man for his own good is to have a healthy love for him.” Michel de Montaigne “Peace cannot be kept by force; it can only be achieved by understanding.” Albert Einstein “The great gift of human beings is that we have the power of empathy, we can all sense a mysterious connection to each other.” Meryl Streep “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.” Plato “I have no right, by anything I do or say, to demean a human being in his own eyes. What matters is not what I think of him; it is what he thinks of himself. To undermine a man's self-respect is a sin.” Antoine de Saint-Exupery “Have compassion and empathy in your heart. Many people are suffering deep emotional anguish beneath the surface of their lives, and smile even as they hurt inside.” Jim Palmer “I think the act of reading imbues the reader with a sensitivity toward the outside world that people who don't read can sometimes lack. I know it seems like a contradiction in terms; after all reading is such a solitary, internalizing act that it appears to represent a disengagement from day-to-day life. But reading, and particularly the reading of fiction, encourages us to view the world in new and challenging ways… It allows us to inhabit the consciousness of another which is a precursor to empathy, and empathy is, for me, one of the marks of a decent human being.” John Connolly “One of the most important things you can do on this earth is to let people know they are not alone.” Shannon L. Alder “The purpose of human life is to serve, and to show compassion and the will to help others.” Albert Schweitzer “Be me a little.” John Ajvide Lindqvist “Attention is the rarest and purest form of generosity.” Simone Weil “It is much more valuable to look for the strength in others. You can gain nothing by criticizing their imperfections.” Daisaku Ikeda “Don’t criticize them; they are just what we would be under similar circumstances.” Abraham Lincoln “Men build too many walls and not enough bridges.” Joseph Fort Newton “Wherever there is a human being there is an opportunity for kindness.” Seneca “If you see someone without a smile, give them one of yours.” Dolly Parton Want even more motivation? Have a look at 83 Patience Quotes to Help You to Keep Pushing and Achieve Your Dreams .

How to Best Handle a Vermont Speeding Ticket or Traffic Ticket: Should A Defendant Pay or Fight a Vermont Traffic Ticket or Speeding Ticket? After receiving a speeding or traffic ticket in Vermont, most people just pay the ticket and put the uncomfortable event behind them. In more serious cases, it is advisable to engage a Rutland traffic attorney as the risk of being found guilty could result in a heavy fine and/or license suspension. It is ultimately the driver’s decision to either pay or fight the Vermont traffic or speeding ticket. It is very important that all defendants carefully consider these four things: What is the fine or penalty of the traffic or speeding ticket? What is the ease of traveling to the court to defend the ticket? (and taking a day off work) What is the risk that an increase in points on the driver’s license could lead to a license suspension? What is the long-term impact that additional driver’s license points are going to have on the driver’s automobile insurance rates? These are often increased following a traffic ticket. What Are The Choices For Anyone Who Gets a Speeding Ticket? The legal process choices for a traffic ticket defendant in Vermont are one of the following: PAY THE TICKET Pay the fine. You are effectively pleading guilty to the charge and will get points on your license and your car insurance will increase. – OR – PLEAD NOT GUILTY – And Negotiate With The Court Go to court and negotiate a lower penalty with the police officer and then plead guilty to a negotiated lower charge – OR – PLEAD NOT GUILTY – Have A Court Case Go to court and have a court case in front of the judge with the police officer testifying against you, if he/she turns up. If you lose the case you will get court costs added. If you win, everything is thrown out. 1 – Paying The Speeding Ticket Just paying the speeding ticket is the easiest route that most drivers take. But It is amazing how quickly points can amass on a driver’s license. There is no going back for do-over when the driver realizes that their insurance are now sky-high. If the driver has over 10 points in a 3 year window, they will lose their license to drive. 2 – Negotiate A Lower Penalty With The Issuing Police Officer Vermont police are often open to negotiate a lower penalty on any tickets. If they have seen the defendant before, then they are less likely to do a deal. This means a court case in front of a traffic judge may be necessary. Drivers should be aware that they will be seeing the same police officer who gave them a ticket in court. As they will have to negotiate with the same police officer, they should be very careful with any backtalk they give the police officer at the time of the citation. The defendant will be seeing the police officer again in court if there is a case. 3- Having the Speeding Ticket Case Heard in Front of a Judge Vermont court judges do not want to have a traffic ticket or speeding ticket case heard in front of them. They have better things to do in their chambers like surf the web for tropical vacation spots. Defendants should be aware that Vermont judges are going to be annoyed if they have to hear evidence in a case for such a minor traffic infraction. Defendants are advised to have a concise and clear case well prepared in order to streamline the process. If the judge has to ask any questions, then the defendant has failed in their presentation. Judges love to watch video evidence because they usually have to rely on written testimony. Dash cam video is very compelling evidence. All Vermont drivers should dashcams as it keeps everyone honest. Using a Traffic Attorney or Representing Yourself (‘Pro-se’) Traffic tickets and their subsequent legal cases in Vermont (and particularly ones in Rutland County) are often not defended by an attorney, but by the drivers themselves. This process is known as ‘Pro-se’. Any penalty from a guilty verdict (through a pleading or a case) is usually just a relatively small financial one. Paying for the services of a Vermont traffic attorney may make the legal case more expensive when compared to just paying the fine or trying to defend the ticket themselves. There are some circumstances when traffic tickets should always be handled by an attorney. Any defendant should balance the fine points and insurance cost increases in that decision-making process. You can always contact a Vermont Attorney to discuss the case. Negotiating with Police Officers at Traffic Court for a Different Fine and Penalty In Rutland County (and also in Windsor County VT) there is no separate prosecutor on any Vermont traffic case. The police officer acts as both the witness and prosecutor in traffic court. The defendant (or their attorney) will often have to meet with the issuing police officer just before the case is to be heard in front of the judge. In more serious traffic charges, where there is not a DUI attached, there is a stronger case for using a Rutland attorney. But simpler cases like a speeding ticket in Vermont traffic court can be negotiated with the police officer at court. In certain circumstances the police officer will not offer a plea bargain. Traffic judges really dislike having a traffic case tried in front of them, which uses up valuable Vermont judicial time. Judges expect most cases to be plea-bargained long before the case ever gets in front of them. Sometimes the issuing police officer may appear to not want to do a plea bargain. In most cases the officer will do it after some encouragement. Vermont Traffic Tickets and Speeding Tickets In Depth Analysis: The True Cost of Traffic Tickets in Vermont is an Increase in Automobile Insurance The fixed penalties of a traffic ticket may appear to be just a single cost event. The true overall costs, to any driver being found guilty of a traffic offense, is an increase in the cost of car insurance. The increases in automobile insurance premium can last up to five years. These costs can often add up to be far larger than the fine of the original traffic ticket. There is also a big impact on the driver if points are mounting up on their license. They may be banned from driving if they reach a certain threshold in points. If a driver already has eight points from previous infractions, then a guilty charge in a speeding ticket case could have the driver banned for a full 6 months. In some cases, the driver may not be able to get any automobile insurance after being found guilty of a dangerous driving charge. What Speeding Ticket Cases are Heard in Rutland, Vermont Traffic Court Many cases are heard in Vermont traffic court. These all come from Rutland County for traffic tickets for all kinds of moving violations and citations. They can include speeding tickets, negligent operation (which also encompasses reckless driving) and eluding a police officer. The last of which is often added with one of the other charges in tow. Defendants can choose to just pay the fine or can defend the ticket in person at Vermont traffic court. Defendants in more serious traffic court cases can also use an attorney to defend themselves in court. In many cases, the police fail to show for a traffic court ticket and the ticket will be summarily dismissed by the judge. Defendants should not always anticipate this and they will still need to show up to court themselves or send an attorney from Rutland. Traffic tickets from the following towns are heard in front of the Rutland Traffic Court in Rutland City. These Vermont towns include Rutland City, Clarendon, Wallingford, Castleton, Fair Haven, Chittendon, Killington, Mendon, Pittsford, Shrewsbury, Plymouth, Pittsfield and Mount Holly. Where Are The Worst Speed Traps In Vermont The most common traffic tickets in Rutland County are for speeding and the most common speeding ticket blackspots that are regularly patrolled by state and local police are at: Route 4 in Fair Haven (close to the Vermont/New York border), Highway Route 7 South of Rutland (near Wallingford and Mount Holly) Route 4 ski traffic heading to Killington (Route 4, between Rutland and Killington) These are the Rutland County speeding ticket hotspots for traffic tickets. They represent over 90% of all traffic tickets issued in the Rutland County area. A Vermont traffic court attorney can often provide a better experience and result from the traffic court system. This would be for defendants from both Rutland County and for drivers from out of town. Most traffic tickets issued are actually issued to out-of-town and out-of-state drivers. The Most common refrain in Vermont from ticketed drivers is that they were stopped while driving over 70 mph on Route 7 in Wallingford in the middle of the night. This location has become the most notorious and prolific speed trap in Vermont. Despite its desolate location and low speed limit many drivers are ticketed there. Some say that the location is just a moneymaker for the surrounding towns. The claim is that there is no reason for the speed limit to be set at a paltry 55 mph. The road is long and straight and has no other impediments. Why Out-Of-State Plates Garner Most Traffic Tickets Out-of-state plates are a notorious magnet for police officers in the Rutland County area. One of the reasons for this may be that the out-of-state drivers probably do not know about the ever-changing local speed limits and laws. They may also not know where the speed traps are located. Police officers will often give a traffic ticket to an out-of-state driver because they know the driver will be less inclined to defend a traffic ticket that is in a Vermont traffic court, which is likely hundreds of miles away from where they live and work. Some Rutland attorneys can actually represent their clients at traffic court, without the clients having to appear in court at all. But traffic judges will often need to hear why their client is not attending the court hearing, as it is often seen to be disrespectful to the court and can go against the client’s case. Suspended Driver’s License in Vermont When drivers are found guilty of any kind of moving violation in the State of Vermont, they will receive points on their driving record. These points will also transfer to other US states. If drivers accumulate 10 points or more within 2 years they will be suspended from driving. That suspension can be as long as 2 years, but as short as 3 months, depending on the charges. The the police officer and the judge also have a say in the level of charges and penalty. When that term expires, driving privileges will not be reinstated until drivers have satisfied all state mandatory requirements, which can even include going back into the classroom. Drivers must also receive written notification of reinstatement from the Department of Motor Vehicles before they can reapply for a license. The Vermont traffic court does not provide ‘hardship” or “work license” dispensations for defendants. If the license points are mounting up, drivers should consider using a traffic attorney as being banned from driving in Vermont can have a considerable impact on the life and livelihood of the defendant and their family. Driving With a Suspended License Driving with a suspended driver’s license is a class 3 felony in Vermont. The offending driver will be subject to arrest. Any legal case for this infraction will not be held in Vermont traffic court. This is a serious crime that can lead to jail time. The case would be transferred to Vermont State Supreme Court. Help For Drivers With Suspended Drivers License Vermont has a program called the Civil DLS Diversion Program, which is designed to help people regain their driver’s license after they have been suspended and while they pay off some of their court fines and fees. The idea is that the court develops a contract with the driver that includes a payment plan and the possibility of reducing the debt if the judge sees that they are following through with the program. A driver must have settled the underlying suspension requirements, like being suspended for too many points, but at least they will not stay suspended if they cannot afford the fines under this program. If the license suspension is a result of a DUI, this program will not be available to the driver as that is seen as a serious offense. For more help with defending a Vermont speeding ticket or traffic ticket you can also visit the Vermont Bar Association website.

“Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Willing is not enough; we must do.” Johann Wolfgang von Goethe “Don't wait. The time will never be just right.” Napoleon Hill What makes dreams into reality? I believe that perhaps the most important – and an often ignored – thing is simply taking action. I used to be really bad at it when I was younger. Back then I usually got stuck. I got stuck in my dreams about what I wanted to do. I got stuck in analysis paralysis due to my habit of overthinking things . I got stuck in procrastination and in pessimism. Things have changed a lot since then though. I have added many new habits that help me to take much more action than I used to. I hope this week's article will help you to do the same. 1. Get your day off to a great start by doing the most important thing. I first learned about this about 19 years ago when I used to sell computers. The boss told us that if we took care of the most important task of the day – often one of the more difficult ones too – right away in the morning the rest of the day would be a lot easier and lighter. He was right about that. When that first and most important task is done you don’t have to worry about it. It won’t weigh down on your day. You feel good about yourself. And you’ll have less inner resistance to taking action for the rest of the day. 2. Just take responsibility for your actions and the process. I love this quote from the ancient Sanskrit Hindu scripture Bhagavad Gita: “To action alone hast thou a right and never at all to its fruits; let not the fruits of action be thy motive; neither let there be in thee any attachment to inaction.” Why? Because every time I look at it or remind myself of it I feel a sort of freedom and relief. This quote reminds me to understand that I cannot control the results of my action. I can’t control how someone reacts to what I say or what I do. It reminds me that it usually works better for me to stay motivated to keep doing what I do if I do something I really like doing. Basically, I do what I think is right and that is my responsibility. And then the rest (the possible results), well, that is not up to me to decide about or try to control. I let it go. Taking action becomes a so much lighter activity when you only have to take responsibility for doing what you think is right. 3. Don’t feel like doing it? Start small. Getting the most important thing done first thing in your day and setting yourself up for an action-packed day sounds great in theory. But in reality you will have unmotivated days. Days when you feel emotionally low or when you are confronted with having to do something you don’t want to do. That’s life. But no reason to let that sink your day into inaction and feeling sorry for yourself. I have found that the best thing for these situations is to start very small. To just… Write for 1-2 minutes. Lift free weights for just a few repetitions. Spend 1 minute with getting started on something that scares me. After that I have the choice to go do something else. But I seldom do. I just need an easy way to get started and then, when I am in motion, I usually continue taking action for a while longer. 4. Don’t hurt yourself. This is a powerful motivator for me to grow and to become a better person. If I don’t do what I deep down think is the right thing to do then I hurt myself and my self-esteem . What I do – or do not do – during my day sends powerful signals back to me about what kind of person I am. There is no escaping yourself. And there is always a price to pay when you don't do what you think is the right thing. 5. A reminder for focus. If you don’t remind yourself often about what you need to focus on and why you are doing it then it is easy to let days slip away or to spend too much time on less important things. So create a a simple reminder on a piece of paper. On it you can for example write down: Your top 3 priorities in life right now. Your most important goal or new habit for the next 30 days. A motto or quote you want to stay focused on and live by at this time in your life. 6. Stay accountable to the people in your life. An accountability buddy can help you to stay on track and to keep taking action towards your goal or dream even when the initial enthusiasm has dissipated. For example, many of you as readers help me to stay accountable to provide helpful content. I get feedback all the time about if I do things in a helpful or less helpful way. I get a ton of encouragement. People closer to me in my life help me to stay accountable to for instance not eating too much unhealthy stuff, to working out and to not working too much. Find someone in real life or online who wants to get in better shape too. Or start a business online . Motivate each other. Keep each other accountable so you take action and take steps forward each week. 7. Cycle fully focused work and fully relaxing rest. Get your kitchen timer or access the stop-watch function on your cellphone. Set the timer for 45 minutes. During those minutes just work on your most important task/small step forward. Nothing else. No distractions. After those 45 minutes are up, take a relaxing break. Distract yourself on Facebook if you like. Or step away from your work space and take a short walk, stretch or go for an apple for the next 15 minutes. By working these fully focused periods of time you’ll: Get more done and do work of higher quality. Be able to concentrate for a longer time in your day and week and get less tired. Train yourself to focus on one thing at time, instead of getting stuck in your mind between work and relaxation and building up friction and stress within. Be able to enjoy your rest periods without a guilty conscience. 45 minutes of work too much? Try 25 minutes instead. Procrastinating half-way into your 25 minute period? Set the timer for 10 or 5 minutes and build up the time that you can fully focus on the work over the next few weeks and months. 8. Focus more on the how to and less on the what-ifs. If your thoughts starts spinning as you are thinking about taking action then in your mind shout: STOP! Don’t allow yourself to get stuck in the negative spiral of analysis paralysis. Sure, it is smart to think before you act in many cases but overthinking things tends to become a way to try to control things you cannot control or to simply stay away from action because you are scared in some way. After you have said stop to that train of thought open up your mind to what you CAN DO instead of all the things that could go wrong in the worst case scenario. Ask yourself questions like: What is one small step I can take today to move forward towards my goal or out of this situation? What is one thing I can learn from this situation? Write down the answers you come up with and take action on them. 9. People don’t care that much about what you do so don’t let that hold you back. When I was younger I almost always let what people may have thought or said if I did something hold me back and I got stuck in inaction. It was more of a self-centered than accurate belief. In reality people have their own things going on in busy lives. They think about the job, kids, a partner, the cat, a vacation, what to have for dinner and they worry about what you and other people may think about them. You are probably not the main character in other people’s lives. Even if you are that in your own life. A realization that can be a bit disappointing but something that can also can set you free from self-imposed bonds. 10. Tap into enthusiasm. When you dream and when you get started with something new in life then the enthusiasm flows like a fountain. A few weeks later it may have decreased quite a bit. Don’t let that lead you to quitting if you think this is something you want to continue doing. Tap into enthusiasm in your surroundings instead. Let the enthusiasm of your accountability buddy flow of over to you and create a flow back to him or her by being enthusiastic about his or her goals and dreams. Listen to podcasts or audiobooks by inspiring people. Read blogs, websites and take courses that help you to get a dose of enthusiasm every week. Let the enthusiasm from friends, children or pets flow over to you. Listen to music and watch movies or Youtube-videos that increase your joy for life. Bring the enthusiasm of the rest of the world into your life. 11. Add the fun. Some tasks simply are boring or not much fun at all. Then try this while you are doing them to add a bit of fun: Add some music that gives you energy and inspires you. Make it into a game where you compete with friend about who can finish something first or do the most amount of something in 10 or 30 minutes. Change your perspective on what you are doing, lighten things up a bit and it tends to become quite a bit easier to take a lot of action on what you may have procrastinated on for some time. 12. Celebrate what you did today. Take 2 minutes at the end of your day to think about, appreciate and celebrate what you have taken action on today. No matter how small the action may have been. It will: Motivate you to get going tomorrow too . Increase your self-esteem over time. Make you feel good about yourself and that feeling will spread to the people in your life too.

“Very little is needed to make a happy life; it is all within yourself, in your way of thinking.” Marcus Aurelius Antoninus “Since you get more joy out of giving joy to others, you should put a good deal of thought into the happiness that you are able to give.” Eleanor Roosevelt Happiness. When you think about it then you may often think of the future in some way. The dream vacation coming up, the promotion you are working towards, the baby that is on the way or the sixth date with someone new in your life. But happiness can also be found in the small things of a regular day. So today look for it there. Take just a few minutes and apply one of the tips below and see how it brightens your day. 1. One minute of appreciation. Take a minute, sit down and just reflect on what you appreciate and love about your partner. Or a friend or family member. Or yourself . This will fill you with gratitude and redirect your focus to the positive side of things. 2. Express your appreciation. Tell the partner, family member or friend what you came up with. It will brighten his or her day. And as his or her face lights up with a big smile you’ll feel happier too because emotions are contagious. 3. Take 5 minutes to see how you can help someone out. Offer some practical help, some good advice, look something up for him or her, be encouraging and supportive or just lend a listening ear. 4. Slow down for 3 minutes. Walk and move slower for just these few minutes. Let your thoughts slow down. Use the 3 minutes to enjoy what is happening all around you. Truly take it in with all your senses. There is much simple wonder we miss each day because we are so preoccupied with our thoughts and plans for the future. After those 3 minutes are up, continue at the slower pace if you like. 5. Be the smile you want to see in your world. Smile more towards the people you meet and you’ll get more smiles back. You’ll feel better. They will too. And they will probably smile more towards the other people they meet that day. So don’t wait for other people to smile more, be the smile you want to see in your world instead. 6. Make someone else happy. Don't stop at just smiles. Give someone a big hug. Give him or her a small or a bigger gift of some kind. Cook their favorite food if they have had a bad day. 7. Start your day with setting a low bar for happiness. As you open your eyes and wake up to a new day tell yourself: “Today I will have a low bar for happiness”. I have been using this one for quite some time now and it makes the regular day happier. I take fewer things for granted – like my food, the weather, the small gestures in my world and the small moments – and often pause to appreciate them more. And it does not make me passive action-wise. Instead it makes me feel more inspired, motivated and inner resistance decreases . And so I get more of importance done. 8. Be the day you want to see. Don’t wait for someone else to create the day you want to have. Instead, get the ball rolling yourself. Take action and take the first small step or steps forward: Set up a movie night when the rain is pouring down. Take a walk or a run in the early morning to get your energy levels for the day and week up. 9. Say yes to something new. Something you haven’t eaten before. A new song or album. A new author or movie. A new sport. A new way to work or through your town. By actively going outside of what is normal for you or your comfort zone you’ll discover new, wonderful things in life quite often . This will bring happiness into your life and if you develop this habit then in my experience it will be easier to move outside of your comfort zone in bigger ways too. 10. Say no to a should. The shoulds in life can really drag that happiness and energy down and make everything feel like heavy work. But do you have to do all of those shoulds on your to-do list? Or are you maybe stuck in a rut and are doing some of those things just out of old habit? Ask yourself one of my favorite questions: Will this matter in 5 years? Or even 5 weeks? By zooming out like this you make it easier to see the true value of doing something. To see it for what it really is. And so your questioning makes it easier to simply relax and to say no to doing something because you realize that it isn’t that important anyway. 11. Take a 2 minute laugh-break. Few things will so simply bring happiness and relieve stress as laughing. So: Revisit one or two of those small video clips that always makes you laugh or smile. Head over to your favorite funny comic online or in your bookshelf. Listen a bit to a podcast or a stand-up show that you know you find funny. 12. Do what you deep down think is the right thing. Instead of letting quick and judgmental words come of your mouth be understanding. Instead of snacking on some candy eat a fruit or drink a glass of water. When an impulse inside of you wants you do something that you know deep down isn't right for you then pause. Be still for a few moments. The impulse will pass. And you can more easily choose to take the action you think is right in this situation. Then appreciate that you did the right thing, give yourself a pat on the back and see how good it all feels. Continue to do this and you’ll help yourself to build a stronger self-esteem . 13. Stand still for a minute, close your eyes and just enjoy the winter sun. I did it yesterday and it was wonderful. This one may however work best if you have had a rainy autumn and a winter filled with grey skies for the last few months.

“Nobody can hurt me without my permission.” Mahatma Gandhi “Do what you feel in your heart to be right – for you’ll be criticized anyway. You’ll be damned if you do, and damned if you don’t.” Eleanor Roosevelt A very common problem that can drag your self-esteem down or build up so much anger that steam may start to come out of your ears is to take things too personally. And so you may try to grow some thicker skin and let criticism, negativity or verbal attacks just wash off of you. But that’s often easier said than done. So in this week’s article I’d like to share 6 habits that really work for me – at least in most cases – and helps me to reduce the stress, anger and hurt in my life. I hope they’ll be useful for you too. 1. Breathe. Just focus on your breathing for a minute or two (or for a few breaths if that’s all the time you got). Focus only on the air going in and out of your nose. Nothing else. This simple exercise helps you to calm your mind and body down a bit. It helps you to create a bit of space between you and what has just happened and by doing so you’re less likely to have a knee-jerk reaction and to, for example, lash out verbally at the other person. Going about things this way makes it easier to respond to the situation in the way you may deep down want to. 2. Get clarification. Don’t jump to conclusions based on what you may have just misunderstood and let that drag you down into anger or to feeling sorry for yourself. Instead, ask questions if possible to help clarify a bit about what the other person meant. And, if you can, explain how what he said makes you feel. We have different perspectives and ways of communicating and he might not, for instance, realize that it came across as a bit harsh or rude. 3. Realize that everything isn’t about you. It’s very easy to fall into the trap of thinking that criticism or verbal attacks you receive are about you or something you did. But it may simply be about the other person having a bad day, week or year. Or about how they are miserable at their job or in their marriage at this time. And so they release some pent up emotions and tensions at you who is simply in the wrong place at the wrong time. Remind yourself of this when you wind up in a situation where you are likely to take things personally. 4. Talk it out. When something gets under your skin and you start to take it personally then you can get stuck in a negative spiral of sinking self-esteem that just gets stronger and stronger. Break out of that or prevent it by letting what happened out into the light. Talk it over with someone close to you and let your friend share her perspective on what happened. Maybe she knows something about how the person that verbally attacked you is going through a tough time. Or she could just listen and through that help you to sort things out for yourself and ground you in a more level-headed perspective on what happened. 5. Ask yourself: is there actually something here that could help me? This one can be a tough one to ask yourself. And it may not always lead to something. But by asking it you can sometimes empower yourself. You can find one or more steps to take to improve whatever the criticism was about. You can start moving forward again and regain confidence in yourself and in what you can do. Instead of getting stuck in inaction and in replaying what happened over and over again in your head. This one can be especially helpful if this is the fifth or tenth time you have heard the same thing from people. Then there might be something here you would like to work on (even if that might not be so fun to face). 6. Improve your self-esteem. I’ve found that as I’ve learned to improve and keep my self-esteem steady things don’t get under my skin as often. I don’t take them so personally and I keep a healthier perspective and distance to them. And so they tend bounce off quicker and not drag my day or week down. One simple way to start improving your self-esteem today is to be kinder to the people in your own life. You can: Help them out practically in some way. Listen when they need the help of a friend to find a better perspective. Give a genuine compliment. Encourage when most of their world may be discouraging. The way you treat other people is how they will most often treat you too in the long run. And, more importantly for your self-esteem, when you are kinder towards others then you tend to treat and think of yourself in a kinder way too.

We all face tough times and setbacks from time to time. That's just a part of life. But how we handle it makes all the difference. So in today's post I’d like to share the best quotes on adversity. Timeless thoughts from the past 2000+ years about how to deal with and overcome adversity but also about what the benefits of adversity in life are. I hope these thoughts and advice will be as helpful for you as they have been for me the past few years. And if you want more motivation then have a look at this post about dealing with the Humpday slump and check out this one filled with quotes about inner peace . Inspiring Quotes about Facing and Overcoming Adversity “Show me someone who has done something worthwhile, and I’ll show you someone who has overcome adversity.” Lou Holtz “Adversity, and perseverance and all these things can shape you. They can give you a value and a self-esteem that is priceless.” Scott Hamilton “In times of great stress or adversity, it’s always best to keep busy, to plow your anger and your energy into something positive.” Lee Iacocca “All the adversity I’ve had in my life, all my troubles and obstacles, have strengthened me… You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you.” Walt Disney “Never lose hope. Storms make people stronger and never last forever.” Roy T. Bennett “Adversity is like a strong wind. It tears away from us all but the things that cannot be torn, so that we see ourselves as we really are.” Arthur Golden “The extent of the struggle determines the extent of the growth. The obstacle is an advantage, not adversity. The enemy is any perception that prevents us from seeing this.” Ryan Holiday “Adversity has ever been considered the state in which a man most easily becomes acquainted with himself.” Samuel Jackson “There is no education like adversity.” Disraeli “Facing it, always facing it, that’s the way to get through. Face it.” Conrad Joseph “Every adversity, every failure, every heartache carries with it the seed of a greater or equal benefit.” Napoleon Hill “The greater the obstacle, the more glory in overcoming it.” Molière “There are uses to adversity, and they don’t reveal themselves until tested. Whether it’s serious illness, financial hardship, or the simple constraint of parents who speak limited English, difficulty can tap unexpected strengths.” Sonia Sotomayor “Adversity is always the partner of progress.” John C. Maxwell “When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it.” Henry Ford “The most successful people see adversity not as a stumbling block, but as a stepping-stone to greatness.” Shawn Anchor “Life is very interesting. In the end, some of your greatest pains become your greatest strengths.” Drew Barrymore “And once the storm is over, you won’t remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive. You won’t even be sure, whether the storm is really over. But one thing is certain. When you come out of the storm, you won’t be the same person who walked in. That’s what this storm’s all about.” Haruki Murakami “Success is to be measured not so much by the position that one has reached in life as by the obstacles which he has overcome.” Booker T. Washington “I haven’t always acted or reacted in a way that made me proud, but I didn’t make that same mistake twice, and I think that’s what I love about adversity is that it always reminds me of what’s really valuable in life.” Sandra Bullock “A hero is an ordinary individual who finds the strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles.” Christopher Reeve “If the road is easy, you're likely going the wrong way.” Terry Goodkind “Fresh activity is the only means of overcoming adversity.”Johann Wolfgang von Goethe “Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender, that is strength.” Arnold Schwarzenegger “Everyone wants to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down.” Oprah Winfrey “Hard times don’t create heroes. It is during the hard times when the “hero” within us is revealed.” Bob Riley “It is in the whole process of meeting and solving problems that life has meaning. Problems are the cutting edge that distinguishes between success and failure. Problems call forth our courage and our wisdom; indeed, they create our courage and our wisdom. It is only because of problems that we grow mentally and spiritually. It is through the pain of confronting and resolving problems that we learn.” M. Scott Peck “You’ll never find a better sparring partner than adversity.” Golda Meir “Tough times never last, but tough people do.” Robert H. Schuller “ Patience is the calm acceptance that things can happen in a different order than the one you have in your mind.” David G. Allen “The only thing that overcomes hard luck is hard work.” Harry Golden ”Spend eighty percent of your time focusing on the opportunities of tomorrow rather than the problems of yesterday.” Brian Tracy “You don't drown by falling in the water; you drown by staying there.” Edwin Louis Cole “It’s not that I’m so smart, it’s just that I stay with problems longer.” Albert Einstein “You can’t really be strong until you can see a funny side to things.” Ken Kesey “When you get into a tight place and everything goes against you, till it seems as though you could not hang on a minute longer, never give up then, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn.” Harriet Beecher Stowe “Often those that criticise others reveal what he himself lacks.” Shannon L. Alder “The brick walls are there for a reason. The brick walls are not there to keep us out. The brick walls are there to give us a chance to show how badly we want something. Because the brick walls are there to stop the people who don’t want it badly enough. They’re there to stop the other people.” Randy Pausch “At any given moment you have the power to say: This is not how the story is going to end.” Christine Mason Miller “Success seems to be largely a matter of hanging on after others have let go.” William Feather “Anyone can give up; it is the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone would expect you to fall apart, now that is true strength.” Chris Bradford “Character consists of what you do on the third and fourth tries.” James A. Michener We face up to awful things because we can't go around them, or forget them. The sooner you say ‘Yes, it happened, and there's nothing I can do about it,' the sooner you can get on with your own life. You've got children to bring up. So you've got to get over it. What we have to get over, somehow we do. Even the worst things.” Annie Proulx “In the depth of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer.” Albert Camus “The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.” Elisabeth Kübler-Ross “When the going gets tough, put one foot in front of the other and just keep going. Don’t give up.” Roy T. Bennett “Problems are not stop signs, they are guidelines.” Robert Schuller “If one dream should fall and break into a thousand pieces, never be afraid to pick one of those pieces up and begin again.” Flavia Weedn “The oak fought the wind and was broken, the willow bent when it must and survived.” Robert Jordan “Nothing in the world is worth having or worth doing unless it means effort, pain, difficulty… I have never in my life envied a human being who led an easy life. I have envied a great many people who led difficult lives and led them well.” Theodore Roosevelt The most essential factor is persistence – the determination never to allow your energy or enthusiasm to be dampened by the discouragement that must inevitably come.” James Whitcomb Riley “Difficulties strengthen the mind, as labor does the body.” Seneca “So it is more useful to watch a man in times of peril, and in adversity to discern what kind of man he is; for then at last words of truth are drawn from the depths of his heart, and the mask is torn off, reality remains.” Lucretius “The world breaks everyone, and afterward, some are strong at the broken places.” Ernest Hemingway “Most of us, swimming against the tides of trouble the world knows nothing about, need only a bit of praise or encouragement – and we will make the goal.” Jerome Fleishman “A happy life consists not in the absence, but in the mastery of hardships.” Helen Keller “You can't be brave if you've only had wonderful things happen to you.” Mary Tyler Moore “Your dream doesn’t have an expiration date. Take a deep breath and try again.” Unknown “If it scares you, it might be a good thing to try.” Seth Godin “Jumping at several small opportunities may get us there more quickly than waiting for one big one to come along.” Hugh Allen “It is a common experience that a problem difficult at night is resolved in the morning after the committee of sleep has worked on it.” John Steinbeck “If we had no winter, the spring would not be so pleasant: if we did not sometimes taste of adversity, prosperity would not be so welcome.” Anne Bradstreet “It takes no more time to see the good side of life than to see the bad.” Jimmy Buffett “Be miserable. Or motivate yourself. Whatever has to be done, it’s always your choice.” Wayne Dyer Quotes About Dealing with Failure, Setbacks and Adversity “Remind thyself, in the darkest moments, that every failure is only a step toward success, every detection of what is false directs you toward what is true, every trial exhausts some tempting form of error, and every adversity will only hide, for a time, your path to peace and fulfillment. ” Og Mandino “Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently.” Henry Ford “I can accept failure, everyone fails at something. But I can’t accept not trying.” Michael Jordan “You may encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated. In fact, it may be necessary to encounter the defeats, so you can know who you are, what you can rise from, how you can still come out of it.” Maya Angelou “Part of being a man is learning to take responsibility for your successes and for your failures. You can’t go blaming others or being jealous. Seeing somebody else’s success as your failure is a cancerous way to live.” Kevin Bacon “Acceptance of what has happened is the first step to overcoming the consequences of any misfortune.” William James “A man may fail many times but he isn’t a failure until he begins to blame somebody else.” John Burroughs “Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try Again. Fail again. Fail better.” Samuel Beckett “All events are blessings given to us to learn from.” Elizabeth Kubler-Ross “Do not be embarrassed by your failures, learn from them and start again.” Richard Branson “Remember that failure is an event, not a person.” Zig Ziglar “Failure should be our teacher, not our undertaker. Failure is delay, not defeat. It is a temporary detour, not a dead-end. Failure is something we can avoid only by saying nothing, doing nothing, and being nothing.” Denis Waitley “Our greatest glory is not in never failing, but in rising every time we fail.” Confucius “Failure isn’t fatal, but failure to change might be.” John Wooden “Children have a lesson adults should learn, to not be ashamed of failing, but to get up and try again. Most of us adults are so afraid, so cautious, so ‘safe,' and therefore so shrinking and rigid and afraid that it is why so many humans fail. Most middle-aged adults have resigned themselves to failure.” Malcolm X “If you set your goals ridiculously high and it’s a failure, you will fail above everyone else’s success.” James Cameron “Most great people have attained their greatest success just one step beyond their greatest failure.” Napoleon Hill “I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.” Michael Jordan

Today I want to share 12 tips that have been really useful for me to calm my anxiety in everyday life. Because if you’re anything like me you have been there many times. You’re sitting in a waiting room. Or just waiting somewhere. Soon it will begin. Your leg is starting to shake nervously. Your hands are starting to sweat and maybe your mouth feels a bit dry. Your thoughts are becoming jumbled, it is hard to focus and to think as clearly as you usually do. Maybe you have an important test in school. A job interview. An appointment with your doctor or dentist. A date that you are looking forward to but at the same time you are scared to make a fool of yourself on. Whatever it may be it is making you anxious. Now, these self-help tips are for relieving low or medium levels of anxiety. They are not intended for anxiety attacks or anything that serious. I know nothing about such things and would recommend that you seek professional help in such situations. 1. Breathe. Sit down, in a quiet place if possible. Breathe a little deeper than usual and do it with your belly and not with your chest. For just a minute or two focus on only the air going in and out of your nostrils. Nothing else. This will calm your mind and body down. And it will bring your attention back to the present moment instead of it being lost in overthinking scary, future scenarios or bad memories from the past . 2. Get good knowledge. Dispel the clouds of uncertainty and vague fears by researching what you have anxiety about. By talking to people who have done what you are about to do or want to do – or by reading what they have written – you can build a more realistic roadmap with both positives and negatives of how things are likely to go. And learn how to improve in the area that gives you anxiety. Do research on the best ways to become better at and less nervous when – for instance – doing public speaking, job interviews or presentations at work or in school. 3. Do a quick workout. I like to lift heavy weights for about 30 minutes when I feel worried, stressed or anxious. It makes me feel stronger both in mind and body. It releases inner tensions and relaxes me. Others go out for a quick run, walk or bike ride when they feel anxious. Find a way to exercise that fits you and lets you reap these benefits and counteract anxiety. 4. Focus on something else. Sometimes it is more helpful to simply redirect your mind instead of thinking about what creates your current anxiety. Especially if you have no control over the situation that causes the anxiety like for example an upcoming appointment with your doctor or the dentist. So focus your attention somewhere else for a while and recharge it with something positive. Watch a couple of episodes of your favorite sit-com or TV-series. Browse your favorite social media feeds. Have relaxing or upbeat evening with friends. Do something that takes your mind off the situation that causes anxiety, even if it is just for a few hours. After that recharge you will not only likely feel better but you will also be in a better headspace and at a higher energy level to handle and think about the anxious situation. 5. Don’t forget to eat. When I forget to eat because I am stressed and anxious then that only tends to worsen my state of mind. It becomes harder to think clearly and negative scenarios more easily pop up in my mind. So even if you don't feel that hungry keep an eye on the clock and if you may be running low on fuel. 6. Change your focus to what you can do right now. When you ask yourself questions that make you feel powerless or like things will only get worse and worse then you take away your personal power . Empower yourself by instead asking yourself: What is one small thing I can do to improve upon this situation today? Write that question down and brainstorm answers for a few minutes. Then take action on one of the answers you find. It doesn’t have to be a big action, just one small step forward. And when you are done with it then take another one. This movement forward will make you feel like you are starting to regain control over your life again, it will make you feel at least a bit more confident and it, in my experience, tends to reduce the anxiety. 7. Question your worries and anxiety. Look to your own past and ask yourself: How many situations that I have been anxious about in the past have turned out to be exaggerations or me making a mountain out of a molehill in my mind? Question your anxiety and worries instead of letting them roam freely. 8. Remember: You have handled tough situations in the past. When you are standing in the middle of anxiety and fear bubbling up within then it is easy to get dragged down with it. To lose faith in yourself and your abilities. When that happens focus on your breathing first to calm and clear your mind. Then look to the past for a bit of strength and confidence in what you can do. Doing this helps me to go from feeling powerless to feeling like I am standing on firmer ground again. 9. Let the feeling in to let it go. Sometimes an anxious feeling can feel sticky and vague. You don’t know exactly where it is coming from or what is causing it. It can be hard to get rid of. A bit of an odd solution that has worked well for me in such situations is this: When you feel a negative feeling then allow and accept that feeling. Don’t try to keep it out. Don’t try to fight it. Even though many of us have learned to do those two things to negative feelings throughout life. Instead, this time, just let it in and observe the feeling in your mind and body without judging it. If you let it in and just observe it for a couple of minutes something wonderful happens. First it may feel uncomfortable and more intense. But then the feeling loses power. It weakens. Often to the point that it just vanishes. Or so you can let it go without much effort . Because when you accept the feeling and let it in you stop feeding it with more energy (as you would when you tried your hardest to keep it out or to fight it). 10. Let it out into the light. When you keep something inside of you then your head can become an echo chamber that magnifies and doubles the anxiety and fear in a situation. So let it out instead. Talk to someone close to you about the situation at hand. Just venting to someone who will listen can help you to get a more grounded view on what's happening. Or the two of you can discuss it and help you to reclaim your power by making a small, initial plan for how you can reduce the anxiety about this situation by taking some kind of action. 11. Stay in the present moment. Anxiety is often a fear of something you think will happen in future. One way to reduce that anxiety is to simply stay with your attention in the present moment as much as you can. Perhaps you make a small plan in advance to help you out but you choose to deal with the anxiety-creating situation when it happens. Instead of spending hours each day with imagining and fearing the future and creating monsters in your mind. The breathing technique at the start of this article is one of the best techniques I have found for returning to the present moment when you get lost in the future. Another one of my favorites you can try is this one: Take 1-2 minutes and focus only on what’s right in front of you. Or around you and on you. Look at what’s right in front of you. Listen to the sounds around you. Feel the fabric of your clothes. Feel the warmth of the winter sun on your skin. 12. Remember: There is a brand new day tomorrow. This reminder helps me when today or the last week may not have gone so well. Because there will be a brand new day tomorrow. A day when you can begin again . A day when you can take a new step to move towards what you want and likely have a bit more luck. And when it will be easier to see that this difficult time is only temporary and not permanent (even if it might feel that way right now).

Looking for a Pilates for Beginners workout that’s quick and effective? Look no further! In this workout, we’ll start out slow with some breathing warm-up exercises, and then I’ll lead you through a series of strength-building Pilates exercises – modifications included! ⁠ You’ll end this workout feeling more centered, energized, and aware of your body and breath. Come back to this workout any time you want a simple but effective routine; anytime you want to fit in a workout but are short on time; or you can even add it on to another workout for an extra kick!⁠ If you’re new to Pilates, this routine will help you become familiar with many Pilates exercises that you’ll also find in a range of our other Pilates workouts; and if you’ve been doing Pilates for a while, you can use this routine to bring things back to basics and slow down a bit to give a little extra focus on form or breathing.⁠ CLICK HERE to view the workout directly on YouTube and let me know how it goes! xo, PS – Looking for more Pilates for Beginners workouts? Click here for more! Ready to BUILD STRENGTH & FEEL GOOD in just 15 minutes a day? Join the FREE 5-day Pilates Strong challenge! JOIN THE FREE CHALLENGE!

“Self-pity is our worst enemy and if we yield to it, we can never do anything wise in this world.” Helen Keller How do you react if something in your life doesn't go as you wish? Well, at first you’ll probably feel pain of some sort. But what happens after that? What do you do after the initial pain? Do you think of yourself as a victim, as someone with little or no control or power? Do you slip back into a familiar headspace where you feel sorry for yourself and where you feel like someone – or the whole world – is against you? I used to get stuck in that destructive and self-esteem sucking way of thinking quite often. And I know that many people get stuck in it from time to time. Or more often than that. So this week I’d like to share 3 steps that helps me to move out of that headspace and replace it with something better. Step 1: Recognize the benefits of the victim mentality. The victim mentality can be pretty beneficial in the short term and for instant gratification. A few benefits are: Attention and validation. You can always get good feelings from other people as they are concerned about you and try to help you out. But it may not last for that long as people get tired of it. You don’t have to take risks. When you feel like a victim you tend to not take action. And so you don’t have to risk, for instance, rejection or failure. Don’t have to take the responsibility. Taking responsibility for your own life can be hard work, you have to make difficult decisions and it is just tough from time to time. In the short term it can feel like the easier choice to not take personal responsibility. It makes you feel like you're right. When you feel like the victim and like someone else is wrong and you are right then that can lead to pleasurable feelings. In my experience, by just being aware of the benefits I can derive from victim thinking it becomes easier to say no to that whenever such thoughts start to creep up and to choose to take a different path. Step 2: Ask yourself what the long-term consequences of this will be. The benefits above can be quite addictive. But what will the long-term consequences of getting stuck in victim thinking be? How will it hold you back from doing the things you deep down dream about in life? How will it affect your most important relationships? How does it affect your relationship with yourself? Be honest with yourself and get motivation to change by seeing how destructively this will affect your life over the next 12 months and over the next 3 or 5 years. Step 3: Replace the victim thinking with something more helpful. To not create a vacuum where all those thoughts about being a victim used to run around for hours upon hours you need to replace the negative thought habits with something more useful. Like for example: Gratitude. After that initial pain is gone – or smaller – you don’t have to create more suffering for yourself. Instead, tap into gratitude . I sometimes do that by asking myself this question to zoom out on my situation and to gain a more level-headed perspective: Does someone on the planet have it worse than me right now? Learn and take action. After tapping into a more grateful frame of mind my mind also becomes more open to getting an optimistic answer out of my next question. It's usually something like: What is one thing I can learn from this situation? Then I follow that up with: What is one small step I can take to move forward or out of this situation today? Ask yourself: How can I give value to one person in my life right now? Help this person out in some way by being kind, by listening or by doing something practically for example. By doing so you’ll feel more powerful again. You’ll create more happiness for the other person and you’ll feel better about your day too. Forgive. I really like this quote about forgiveness from Catherine Ponder: “When you hold resentment toward another, you are bound to that person or condition by an emotional link that is stronger than steel. Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that link and get free.” You don’t have to forgive just because it is something you “should do”. You don’t have to do it to be the better person either. You can do it just for yourself. For your own well-being and freedom. Release yourself from the agony and focus your limited time and energy on things that will make you happier.

Patience is perhaps one of the most underrated qualities a person can have. Because if you are patient and keep moving forward towards your dream or goal – day after day and week after week despite the inevitable setbacks – you will most likely reach it. While whatever competition you had will in most cases have given up some time ago. In this post I'd like to share the best quotes about patience that I've found. The timeless thoughts that have inspired me to keep going even when I wanted to give up. And the ones that have helped me to reach my own small and bigger dreams. I hope you'll find something helpful and inspiring here. And if you want more motivation check out this post with quotes about how to power through the hump day slump and this one with quotes about inner peace . Inspiring and Motivational Quotes about Patience “God bestows upon one man genius without patience and upon another man patience without genius. The relative achievements of the two are often surprising.” Walter C. Klein “Have patience with all things, but chiefly have patience with yourself. Do not lose courage in considering you own imperfections but instantly set about remedying them – every day begin the task anew.” St. Francis de Sales “Be patient with yourself. Self-growth is tender; it’s holy ground. There’s no greater investment.” Stephen Covey “Patience serves as a protection against wrongs as clothes do against cold. For if you put on more clothes as the cold increases, it will have no power to hurt you. So in like manner you must grow in patience when you meet with great wrongs, and they will be powerless to vex your mind.” Leonardo Da Vinci “Patience is the companion of wisdom.” St. Augustine “Patience attracts happiness; it brings near that which is far.” Swahili Proverb “Patience is the calm acceptance that things can happen in a different order than the one you have in your mind.” David G. Allen “The further the reward from the effort, the thinner the competition. Patience is the gatekeeper.” Johnny Uzan “Every great dream begins with a dreamer. Always remember, you have within you the strength, the patience, and the passion to reach for the stars to change the world.” Harriet Tubman “The secret of patience is to do something else in the meantime.” Croft M. Pentz “If I have made any valuable discoveries, it has been owing more to patient attention than to any other talent.” Sir Isaac Newton “Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet.” Aristotle “Rivers know this: there is no hurry. We shall get there some day.” A.A. Milne “Patience is necessary, and one cannot reap immediately where one has sown.” Soren Kierkegaard “Nothing gives one person so much advantage over another as to remain always cool and unruffled under all circumstances.” Thomas Jefferson “How can a society that exists on instant mashed potatoes, packaged cake mixes, frozen dinners, and instant cameras teach patience to its young?” Paul Sweeney “Patience and perseverance have a magical effect before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish.” John Quincy Adams “The keys to patience are acceptance and faith. Accept things as they are, and look realistically at the world around you. Have faith in yourself and in the direction you have chosen.” Ralph Marston “Learning patience can be a difficult experience, but once conquered, you will find life is easier.” Catherine Pulsifer “Adopt the pace of nature: her secret is patience.” Ralph Waldo Emerson “The two most powerful warriors are patience and time.” Leo Tolstoy “Patience is the best remedy for every trouble.” Plautus “It’s not that I’m so smart, it’s just that I stay with problems longer.“ Albert Einstein “One moment of patience may ward off great disaster. One moment of impatience may ruin a whole life.” Chinese Proverb “Patience is power. Patience is not an absence of action; rather it is “timing” it waits on the right time to act, for the right principles and in the right way.” Fulton J. Sheen “Trying to understand is like straining through muddy water. Have the patience to wait! Be still and allow the mud to settle.” Lao Tzu “Have patience. All things are difficult before they become easy.” Saadi “Patience can’t be acquired overnight. It is just like building up a muscle. Every day you need to work on it.” Eknath Easwaran “Patience is the key to paradise.” Turkish Proverb “The key to everything is patience. You get the chicken by hatching the egg, not by smashing it.” Arnold H. Glasow “Patience has its limits. Take it too far, and it’s cowardice.” George Jackson “We could never learn to be brave and patient if there were only joy in the world.” Helen Keller “He that can have patience, can have what he will.” Benjamin Franklin “Sometimes things aren’t clear right away. That’s where you need to be patient and persevere and see where things lead.” Mary Pierce “Have courage for the great sorrows of life and patience for the small ones; and when you have laboriously accomplished your daily task, go to sleep in peace. God is awake.” Victor Hugo “This is one more piece of advice I have for you: don't get impatient. Even if things are so tangled up you can't do anything, don't get desperate or blow a fuse and start yanking on one particular thread before it's ready to come undone. You have to realize it's going to be a long process and that you'll work on things slowly, one at a time.” Haruki Murakami “It ain’t as bad as you think. It will look better in the morning.” Colin Powell “Patience and fortitude conquer all things” Ralph Waldo Emerson “Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all.” Dale Carnegie “Experience has taught me this, that we undo ourselves by impatience. Misfortunes have their life and their limits, their sickness and their health.” Michel de Montaigne “Trust the process. Your time is coming. Just do the work and the results will handle themselves.” Tony Gaskins “One minute of patience, ten years of peace.” Greek proverb “With love and patience, nothing is impossible.” Daisaku Ikeda “With the new day comes new strength and new thoughts.” Eleanor Roosevelt “Life is not easy for any of us. But what of that? We must have perseverance and, above all, confidence in ourselves. We must believe that we are gifted for something, and that this thing, at whatever cost, must be attained.” Marie Curie “When you encounter various trials, big or small, be full of joy. They’re opportunities to learn patience.” Scott Curran “I have seen many storms in my life. Most storms have caught me by surprise, so I had to learn very quickly to look further and understand that I am not capable of controlling the weather, to exercise the art of patience and to respect the fury of nature.” Paulo Coelho “I have just three things to teach: simplicity, patience, compassion. These three are your greatest treasures.” Lao Tzu “It is very strange that the years teach us patience – that the shorter our time, the greater our capacity for waiting.” Elizabeth Taylor “Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender, that is strength.” Arnold Schwarzenegger “Patience, persistence, and perspiration make an unbeatable combination for success.” Napoleon Hill “A hero is an ordinary individual who finds the strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles.” Christopher Reeve “Our patience will achieve more than our force.” Edmund Burke “Come what may, all bad fortune is to be conquered by endurance.” Virgil “To lose patience is to lose the battle.” Mahatma Gandhi “Two things define you: your patience when you have nothing and your attitude when you have everything.” George Bernard Shaw “Genius is nothing but a great aptitude for patience.” George-Louis de Buffon “Nothing in the world can take the place of perseverance. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful people with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost legendary. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Perseverance and determination alone are omnipotent.” Calvin Coolidge “I will not be distracted by noise, chatter, or setbacks. Patience, commitment, grace, and purpose will guide me.” Louise Hay “The people who stick with things for years and never stop almost always win the race.” James Clear Quotes that Will Help You to Be Patient When You Face a Setback “Never cut a tree down in the wintertime. Never make a negative decision in the low time. Never make your most important decisions when you are in your worst moods. Wait. Be patient. The storm will pass. The spring will come.” Robert H. Schuller “Remember that failure is an event, not a person.” Zig Ziglar “You may encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated. In fact, it may be necessary to encounter the defeats, so you can know who you are, what you can rise from, how you can still come out of it.” Maya Angelou “I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.” Michael Jordan “The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.” Elizabeth Kubler-Ross “Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.” Winston Churchill “The best way out is always through.” Robert Frost “Our strength grows out of our weaknesses.” Ralph Waldo Emerson “Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try Again. Fail again. Fail better.” Samuel Beckett “Be patient and understanding. Life is too short to be vengeful or malicious.” Phillips Brooks “A man may fail many times but he isn’t a failure until he begins to blame somebody else.” John Burroughs “What do you first do when you learn to swim? You make mistakes, do you not? And what happens? You make other mistakes, and when you have made all the mistakes you possibly can without drowning – and some of them many times over – what do you find? That you can swim? Well – life is just the same as learning to swim! Do not be afraid of making mistakes, for there is no other way of learning how to live!” Alfred Adler “Just because you fail once doesn't mean you're gonna fail at everything.” Marilyn Monroe “There is no such thing as failure, only results.” Tony Robbins “When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it.” Henry Ford “The master has failed more times than the beginner has tried.” Stephen McCranie “If you fell down yesterday, stand up today.” H.G. Wells “An inventor fails 999 times, and if he succeeds once, he’s in. He treats his failures simply as practice shots.” Charles F. Kettering “Everything you want is on the other side of fear.” Jack Canfield “The brick walls are there for a reason. The brick walls are not there to keep us out. The brick walls are there to give us a chance to show how badly we want something. Because the brick walls are there to stop the people who don’t want it badly enough. They’re there to stop the other people.” Randy Pausch “Your dream doesn’t have an expiration date. Take a deep breath and try again.” Unknown “When things go wrong as they sometimes will, When the road you’re trudging seems all uphill, When the funds are low and the debts are high, And you want to smile but you have to sigh, When care is pressing you down a bit Rest if you must, but don’t you quit. Success is failure turned inside out, The silver tint on the clouds of doubt, And you can never tell how close you are, It may be near when it seems afar. So, stick to the fight when you’re hardest hit It’s when things go wrong that you mustn’t quit.” Edgar A. Guest

Today I want to share the best quotes on inner peace that I’ve found in the past decade. Because the daily life can be so busy, stressful and sometimes even overwhelming. But there are things you can do. To center yourself. To find – and over time step by step increase – your inner calm and peace. These 70 timeless and thought provoking quotes will help you with that. And if you want more motivation and inspiration then check out this post with many quotes on change in life and this one that that's filled with quotes on confidence . Inner Peace Quotes to Help You to Calm Your Mind and Center Yourself “The simplification of life is one of the steps to inner peace. A persistent simplification will create an inner and outer well-being that places harmony in one’s life.” Peace Pilgrim “Peace is the result of retraining your mind to process life as it is, rather than as you think it should be.” Wayne Dyer “You’ll never find peace of mind until you listen to your heart.” George Michael “The life of inner peace, being harmonious and without stress, is the easiest type of existence.” Norman Vincent Peale “When you do the right thing, you get the feeling of peace and serenity associated with it. Do it again and again.” Roy T. Bennett “He who lives in harmony with himself lives in harmony with the universe.” Marcus Aurelius “Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without.” Buddha “You find peace not by rearranging the circumstances of your life, but by realizing who you are at the deepest level.” Eckhart Tolle “Possession of material riches, without inner peace, is like dying of thirst while bathing in a lake.” Paramahansa Yogananda “We can never obtain peace in the outer world until we make peace with ourselves.” Dalai Lama “Acceptance of others, their looks, their behaviors, their beliefs, bring you an inner peace and tranquility – instead of anger and resentment.” Unknown “If there’s no inner peace, people can’t give it to you. The husband can’t give it to you. Your children can’t give it to you. You have to give it to you.” Linda Evans “My heart forgives and releases. Inner peace is my goal.” Louise Hay “Set peace of mind as your highest goal, and organize your life around it.” Brian Tracy “To experience peace does not mean that your life is always blissful. It means that you are capable of tapping into a blissful state of mind amidst the normal chaos of a hectic life.” Jill Bolte Taylor “Learning to ignore things is one of the great paths to inner peace.” Robert J. Sawyer “Ego says – Once everything falls into place, I’ll feel inner peace. Spirit says – Find your inner peace and then everything will fall into place.” Marianne Williamson “Inner peace can be reached only when we practice forgiveness. Forgiveness is letting go of the past, and is therefore the means for correcting our misperceptions.” Gerald Jampolsky “Never continue in a job you don't enjoy. If you're happy in what you're doing, you'll like yourself, you'll have inner peace. And if you have that, along with physical health, you'll have more success than you could possibly have imagined.” Roger Caras “For me, success is inner peace.” Denzel Washington “Happiness can only be achieved by looking inward & learning to enjoy whatever life has and this requires transforming greed into gratitude.” John Chrysostom “How we perceive a situation and how we react to it is the basis of our stress. If you focus on the negative in any situation, you can expect high stress levels. However, if you try and see the good in the situation, your stress levels will greatly diminish .” Catherine Pulsifer “Do not let the behavior of others destroy your inner peace.” Dalai Lama “Nothing can disturb your peace of mind unless you allow it to.” Roy T. Bennett “Outward peace is useless without inner peace.” Mahatma Gandhi “Nothing gives one person so much advantage over another as to remain always cool and unruffled under all circumstances.” Thomas Jefferson “Love and peace of mind do protect us. They allow us to overcome the problems that life hands us. They teach us to survive… to live now… to have the courage to confront each day.” Bernie Siegel “If you cannot find peace within yourself, you will never find it anywhere else.” Marvin Gaye “Never be in a hurry; do everything quietly and in a calm spirit. Do not lose your inner peace for anything whatsoever, even if your whole world seems upset.” St. Francis de Sales “Tension is who you think you should be. Relaxation is who you are.” Chinese proverb “Feelings come and go like clouds in a windy sky. Conscious breathing is my anchor.” Thich Nhat Hanh “Breathe. Let go. And remind yourself that this very moment is the only one you know you have for sure.” Oprah “A compassionate state of mind brings inner peace, and therefore a healthier body.” Dalai Lama “Adopt the pace of nature: her secret is patience.” Ralph Waldo Emerson “Learn to calm down the winds of your mind, and you will enjoy great inner peace.” Romez Sasson “Your inner peace is the greatest and most valuable treasure that you can discover.” Akin Olokun “Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow, it only saps today of its joy.” Leo F. Buscaglia “The truth is that stress doesn’t come from your boss, your kids, your spouse, traffic jams, health challenges, or other circumstances. It comes from your thoughts about your circumstances.” Andrew Bernstein “It is so important to take time for yourself and find clarity. The most important relationship is the one you have with yourself.” Diane Von Furstenberg “When you recover or discover something that nourishes your soul and brings joy, care enough about yourself to make room for it in your life.” Jean Shinoda Bolen “Accept yourself, love yourself, and keep moving forward. If you want to fly, you have to give up what weighs you down.” Roy T. Bennett “Stress is caused by being ‘here' but wanting to be ‘there.' Eckhart Tolle “No price is too great to pay for inner peace.” Sri Chinmoy “Rest is not idleness, and to lie sometimes on the grass under the trees on a summer’s day, listening to the murmur of water, or watching the clouds float across the sky, is by no means a waste of time.” John Lubbock “These mountains that you are carrying, you were only supposed to climb.” Najwa Zebian “Take rest; a field that has rested gives a bountiful crop.” Ovid “If people concentrated on the really important things in life, there'd be a shortage of fishing poles.” Doug Larson “It is so important to take time for yourself and find clarity. The most important relationship is the one you have with yourself.” Diane Von Furstenberg “It's a funny thing about life, once you begin to take note of the things you are grateful for, you begin to lose sight of the things that you lack.” Germany Kent “Respect yourself enough to say – I deserve inner peace – and walk away from people and things that prevent you from attaining it.” Jerico Silvers “Learning to distance yourself from all the negativity is one of the greatest lessons to achieve inner peace.” Roy T. Bennett “One of the best pieces of advice I ever got was from a horse master. He told me to go slow to go fast. I think that applies to everything in life. We live as though there aren't enough hours in the day but if we do each thing calmly and carefully we will get it done quicker and with much less stress.” Viggo Mortensen “In the woods, we return to reason and faith. There I feel that nothing can befall me in life—no disgrace, no calamity (leaving me my eyes), which nature cannot repair.” Ralph Waldo Emerson “You cannot always control what goes on outside. But you can always control what goes on inside.” Wayne Dyer “The best fighter is never angry.” Lao Tzu “Don’t believe every worried thought you have. Worried thoughts are notoriously inaccurate.” Renee Jain “The time to relax is when you don't have time for it.” Sydney J. Harris “We can easily manage if we will only take, each day, the burden appointed to it. But the load will be too heavy for us if we carry yesterday’s burden over again today, and then add the burden of the morrow before we are required to bear it.” John Newton “Pleasure is always derived from something outside you, whereas joy arises from within.” Eckhart Tolle ”People become attached to their burdens sometimes more than the burdens are attached to them.” George Bernard Shaw “The more tranquil a man becomes, the greater is his success, his influence, his power for good. Calmness of mind is one of the beautiful jewels of wisdom.” James Allen “That the birds of worry and care fly over your head, this you cannot change, but that they build nests in your hair, this you can prevent.” Chinese Proverb “For fast-acting relief, try slowing down. “ Lily Tomlin “One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is terribly important.” Bertrand Russell “Success is measured by your discipline and inner peace.” Mike Ditka “How beautiful it is to do nothing, and then to rest afterward.” Spanish proverb “A crust eaten in peace is better than a banquet partaken in anxiety. “ Aesop “If you ask what is the single most important key to longevity, I would have to say it is avoiding worry, stress and tension. And if you didn't ask me, I'd still have to say it.” George Burns “If you treat every situation as a life and death matter, you’ll die a lot of times.” Dean Smith “Nobody can bring you peace but yourself.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

“When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive – to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love.” Marcus Aurelius The alarm bell goes off. You slowly open your eyes. A new day lies before you. A day of unexplored potential and opportunities. How can you make it more likely to become a positive and good day? Today I’d like to simply share 7 habits that I have used to make my mornings and whole days better. 1. Have a reminder on your bedside table. How will you start your very first moments and minutes of the day? One good way to get off to a good start is to have a note, a reminder on your bedside table that will be one of the first things you see after you have woken up. A couple of suggestions for what to write down on your note: A low bar for happiness. Write down: “Today I will set a low bar for happiness”. Read it and try to keep it in mind during the day. This one helps me to appreciate things more . The food, my work, the weather, the people and the small events of the day becomes not everyday stuff but something I feel happy to have. The small things or what may be something one takes for granted becomes something I now often pause for a moment or two to take in and appreciate. Your top 3 priorities in life right now. To keep your attention in the right place it is essential to remind yourself every day of what is truly most important. So what is most important for you this year? A project at work? Your family? Improving your social life? Your blog, photography, soccer or debt? Think about it and reduce what is important in your life to the top 3 most important priorities. 2. Give one genuine compliment. Giving one genuine compliment to your partner, a family member, friend or co-worker during your morning can not only lift his or her day but also make yours a little brighter and happier. So tap into what you can appreciate about a person in your life. Then tell him or her that. If you can, make it something that may be a bit unexpected and something that person hasn’t heard a hundred times before. For example, a compliment about her great taste in music or his wonderful way with animals may be more appreciated and powerful than a compliment about looks and other more superficial stuff. 3. Positive information intake over breakfast. Instead of watching the news or reading the papers and getting a negative and perhaps depressing start to your day do something that will inspire you. Read one or a couple of new posts from positive, funny and uplifting blogs or websites. Read a chapter from a book that inspires you (or a handful of quotes that motivate you ). Or simply have a fun and warm conversation with the people around your kitchen table. 4. Start your workday with your most important task of the day. If you do then the rest of the day will feel lighter and easier. You will feel better about yourself and more confident as you move on to other tasks. If you have trouble getting started with the most important task then just make a deal with yourself to work on it for 3 minutes. Then you can stop if you like. But you may not want to once you have gotten started. That seems to be the case for me most of the time. Getting started is most often the hardest part. So make that part easier for yourself. 5. Go slow. When I go a bit slower it becomes easier to fully focus, to keep the stress down and I most often do a better job with something the first time around. I work with more clarity and I do not get stuck in doing busy work very often. It may feel like I’m not getting enough done but at the end of the day I usually get more quality work done than if I tried to maintain a high speed throughout the day. Partly because the lower stress levels keeps my mind fresh and energy up even through the last few afternoon hours of the workday. Try going a bit slower. See how it works for you. 6. Work out. Often mentioned and for a good reason. It has many positive benefits. I workout several times a week and by doing so I boost my energy, inner doubts and tensions lessen, I feel more decisive and my mind becomes more optimistic. And all of that makes the rest of the day lighter. I highly recommend doing some kind of exercise in the morning. If you can’t go to a gym or work out from home early in the day then maybe you can walk or bicycle to work or school. 7. Do the right thing in some small or big way. This one boosts your self-esteem . It puts a spring in your step and it at least makes me feel happier. So do what you deep down think is the right thing. A few examples that may resonate with you: Perform a random act of kindness. Hold up the door or point out the way for someone who seems lost. Help someone out practically or just by listening. Get started with putting a dent in the most important challenge in your life. Build upon just a small step, a small thing if you like. Start building an upward spiral of positivity and good feelings within. And then take further steps upward. Towards what you know you really want and you know are the right things for you in your life.

I’ve received many requests for a new Pilates ring workout and I’m excited to share a new one with you today! The Pilates ring is an incredibly versatile and lightweight prop that allows you to incorporate resistance training into your Pilates practice. Using a Pilates ring can help you engage the proper muscles and adjust your alignment. In this 10-minute routine, you’ll tone and strengthen your entire body through exercises using the Pilates ring (and no worries if you don’t have a ring – you’ll still get a great workout without it!). This routine is great to sneak in any time of day for a great full-body workout! Click here to watch the video directly on youtube! And be sure to subscribe to my channel so you never miss a workout. Let me know if you try this workout! xo, PS – Have any other Pilates workout requests? Leave me a comment below and let me know and check out more quick Pilates workouts on the blog ! Ready to BUILD STRENGTH & FEEL GOOD in just 15 minutes a day? Join the FREE 5-day Pilates Strong challenge! JOIN THE FREE CHALLENGE!

“May you have warmth in your igloo, oil in your lamp, and peace in your heart!” Eskimo proverb The holidays are upon us. A time of needed relaxation and more time with the people closest to us . A time of stress and worries. A time of not all the joy you may have hoped for or been promised by upbeat advertising and movies. It can be a time of mixed feelings (even more so this time as we are reaching the end of a very strange and tough year). So today I would like to share 5 powerful and timeless tips that can help you to make the holidays – and 2021 too – a more joyful and peaceful time. 1. Slow down. “For fast-acting relief, try slowing down.” Lily Tomlin First, slow down. Even if it may feel silly and if you have to force it a bit. Slow down your body, move and walk slowly. Breathe slower and more deeply with your belly (and focus on doing just that for two minutes and see what happens). Slow down your eating (this will not only help you to relax, it will also help you to not eat too much during the holidays since it takes about 20 minutes for your brain to register that you are full). Slow it all down and pay attention to what you are doing. Be here now and focus on doing just one thing at a time. By slowing down, by being here now, by not having your focus split between many things you – your body and your mind – start to relax. 2. Appreciate the little things instead of focusing on perfection. “Nobody can be uncheered with a balloon.” Winnie the Pooh Daily happiness is to a large part about appreciating the small things. If you just allow yourself to be happy when accomplishing a big goal or when everything lines up just perfectly then you are making life harder than it needs to be. Instead, focus on appreciating things that you may take for granted. Take two minutes and find things in your life you can appreciate now. If you want a handful of suggestions, here are a few of the things that I like to appreciate around the holidays: All the tasty food. My health. My family and friends. That I have a roof and a warm home as the snow is falling and the cold winds are blowing. The beautiful wintery landscapes. 3. Give a bit of joy to someone else. “Since you get more joy out of giving joy to others, you should put a good deal of thought into the happiness that you are able to give.” Eleanor Roosevelt This may sound like an empty cliche but it surely works. One of the best ways to become happier is simply to make others happier. When you make someone else happy you can sense, see, feel and hear it. And that happy feeling flows back to you. And since the Law of Reciprocity is strong there is another upside. People will feel like giving back to you. Or like paying it forward to someone else. And so the two (or more) of you keep building an upward spiral of for example positivity, of helping out, of cheering up and of lending a listening ear and support. 4. Focus on what is most valuable. “You can never get enough of what you don’t need to make you happy.” Eric Hoffer “Joy is not in things; it is in us.” Benjamin Franklin Instead of focusing on a lot of things focus on what is most important and valuable to you. If you still have Christmas gifts to buy then instead of giving away a lot of expensive stuff it may be better to give one thing that the person you are giving it to will truly appreciate. Or maybe you could skip giving a physical thing altogether. And instead give away an experience that will become a special day and cherished memory for him or her or for the two of you. However you choose to go about things over the holidays make it YOUR choices as best you can and not a bunch of shoulds that mostly make you feel deflated . 5. Just accept how you feel right now. “We cannot change anything until we accept it. Condemnation does not liberate, it oppresses.” Carl Jung Maybe you try some of the tips above. And they still can't help you to shake that negativity, worries or stress you are carrying around. I would then suggest that you just accept that the feeling is there. Tell yourself: This is how I feel right now and I accept it. This might sound counter-intuitive and like you are giving up. However, by accepting how you feel instead of resisting it you reduce the emotional energy that you are feeding into this conflict or problem. And it then tends to lose speed like a car that runs out of fuel. Sometimes the problem or conflict will then become so weak that it just moves out of your mind. By accepting what is you have now freed up energy and your attention so your mind can become more level-headed, open and constructive once again. And you can see more clearly and take focused action towards a solution.

Do you struggle with tension in your upper and lower back or are you looking to help improve your overall mobility? Then this foam roller routine is for you! In this quick workout, I’m going to lead you through a few stretches that you can do with your foam roller to help release tension in your upper and lower back, improve overall mobility, and feel good. Click here to watch this video directly on youtube – these quick stretches are a perfect way to end another Pilates workout, run, or walk. Give these stretches a try today – you’re going to feel so good when you’re done! xo, PS – Looking for a delicious and cozy meal for dinner? Check out this turkey and sweet potato immune-boosting soup – perfect for a cold winter day! Ready to BUILD STRENGTH & FEEL GOOD in just 15 minutes a day? Join the FREE 5-day Pilates Strong challenge! JOIN THE FREE CHALLENGE!

Hi friends! Every year I set a goal to embrace a  “Slow December”  and after the events of 2020, I think it’s even more important this year to slow down, reset, and recharge for a new year. Now that I have a whole team working with me here at The Balanced Life, it would be easy to give this up and continue with business as usual. But, I’ve held on to this concept of “Slow December” and now I encourage my team (and our whole community) to embrace this too! We are working on some really exciting new things for 2021 and can’t WAIT to share them with you soon. But for now, we hope you’ll join us in slowing down this season, connecting with those you love, and looking ahead to an exciting new year with The Balanced Life. In true 2020 fashion, I hope you enjoy our “team photo” – thanks to Zoom. 🙂 And I thought it would be fun to round up the best of 2020 at The Balanced Life with your favorite blog posts + podcasts. Check out the top 5 below if you’re looking for a quick workout, a last minute gift idea, or need a podcast to listen to on a morning walk. 🙂 Bedtime Pilates Routine Episode 30: A recipe for burnout – and how you can avoid it Episode 32: Biggest mistakes I’ve made that held me back from being the healthiest version of myself Energizing Morning Pilates Routine The Balanced Life’s 2020 Gift Guides Wishing you and your loved ones a happy holiday season! xo, Robin + The Balanced Life Team Get 3 FREE Pilates workouts in your inbox now! YES PLEASE!

“People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing – that’s why we recommend it daily.” Zig Ziglar Some days you wake up motivated and ready to go. On some days things feel heavy and it is hard to get going and find that inner drive . And there are often roadblocks, plateaus and valleys along the way towards what you want where you can fall into a slump. Or get lost in a rut. And you feel like your motivation has flown away. So today I’d like to simply share three of my favorites and in my experience most effective ways to find that motivation again. 1. Do the 10 minute recharge exercise. Here's how you do this motivation exercise. Sit down in a quiet place. Close your eyes. Ask yourself these two questions: How will my life look in 5 years if I just continue to stay on the same path as now? How will life likely become worse for me and maybe even for the people around me? It may be uncomfortable but try to see the negative consequences as vividly as you can in your mind to kickstart your motivation to get going for that positive change. Then ask yourself: How will my life look in 1 year if I stick with it and I keep going with this change? How will it look in 5 years? How will life improve not only for me but for the people that I love if I stick with it? With these two sets of questions try to not just to see the future as detailed and as vividly as you can but also find your own very personal reason(s) for making the change. For example, getting into better shape could help you to become more optimistic and more energetic. That’s great. But to really find the heart of your motivation keep looking for a few more minutes for the more personal answer. The answer could be that you want to make this change in your health because if you don't then you might not have the energy to have fun and play as much as you want with your son while he is young. And as he grows up you may be too tired from work to give him quality time each day. If you want to make a change in your money habits then it could be because you always dreamed of seeing the pyramids of Egypt or visiting the Maldives with the person you love most in the world. Write down those deepest reasons on a piece of paper and put that note where you cannot avoid seeing it every day. 2. Let the motivation sparkling in other people flow over to you. Another great way to recharge your motivation is simply to tap into the motivational energy and perspectives of other people. So talk to the people in your life about their dreams and what they feel most motivated to achieve and to do in their lives. But don’t feel confined to just the people you know in real life. I often recharge my motivation by listening to a small part of an audio book by Brian Tracy or Wayne Dyer. Or I may watch a Youtube video by Ali Abdaal or Matt D'Avella. Or read a chapter in a book on my Kindle. Spending just 5 or 10 minutes with doing that can, in my experience, very often turn your mood and mindset around and ignite your motivation again. 3. Just get started and let the motivation catch up with you. Sometimes the two tips above might not work that well even though they are very powerful. What can you do then? Well, you can take a break and recharge your batteries because that is sometimes simply what is needed. Or you can do what I quite often do when I am having an uninspired morning. I get started anyway, despite the lack of motivation within. I do so by taking a small step forward and by just focusing on taking that one step. I may for example tell myself that I will work on a new article or on editing a part of a new course for 3 minutes. When that is done then I take another small step and I focus only on that until it is done. At first doing that task may not feel fun or interesting but it is just a small step that I need to take so it feels acceptable. Things don’t stay that way though. The next step tends to be a bit easier and maybe even a bit enjoyable. And by the step after that one the motivation is catching up with me and I am starting to have fun and to truly enjoy what I am doing. You will most likely not feel motivated every day . That is OK. You can get going step by small step anyway and soon the motivation will start to catch up with you.

Looking for a recipe to keep you warm and cozy this winter? Full of nourishing ingredients like garlic, bone broth, spinach, and turmeric – this delicious turkey & sweet potato immune-boosting soup is the perfect cozy meal for when you aren’t feeling your best or just want something to warm you up on a chilly day. INGREDIENTS: Coconut or avocado oil for cooking 1 lb ground turkey 2 cloves of garlic, minced 1 small yellow onion, chopped 7 cups chicken or turkey bone broth 1.5 medium sweet potatoes, peeled and cubed 1 cup canned chickpeas drained and rinsed 1 handful of chopped spinach or kale 1⁄2 tsp ground turmeric 1⁄4 tsp ground ginger Sea salt and pepper to taste INSTRUCTIONS: Start by heating a large skillet over medium heat with coconut or avocado oil. Add the ground turkey and saute until completely cooked through. While the turkey is cooking, add additional oil to a large stockpot over medium heat and add the garlic and onion. Saute for 3-5 minutes or until translucent. Add the cooked ground turkey to the pot with the garlic and onion and add the bone broth, cubed sweet potatoes, and chickpeas. Bring to a boil and then reduce to a simmer and cook for about 20-25 minutes or until the sweet potatoes are tender. Add the chopped spinach or kale, turmeric, ginger, salt, and pepper. Stir well. Cool and pour into a serving bowl. Enjoy! Hope you have a wonderful winter season! xo, PS – Not feeling 100%? Check out my sick day survival guide for my tricks for boosting my immune system this time of year. Ready to finally stay consistent with exercise – even when you’re short on time & energy? Join me for the FREE Creating Healthy Routines Workshop & walk away with an exercise routine you can put into action immediately! I'M READY FOR THIS!

“The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.” Lao Tzu “The distance is nothing; it is only the first step that is difficult.” Madame Marie du Deffand Making a positive change in your life does not have to be about making a huge leap. But I believe that belief is one of those things that hold people back from improving their life and world. A simpler way that more often results in actual action being taken and new habits being established – in my life at least – is to take smaller steps but many of them. So today I'd like to share 10 quick habits that can help you to change your life in just 2 minutes or so a day. Through these small steps you can start to build habits that become stronger and over time can change your life in ways you perhaps can’t imagine now. To remember to actually do one of the things below each day I recommend writing down a simple reminder. Put it on your nightstand so that you see it when you wake up each morning. Or put the note in your workspace so you see it early in your day. If you like and if possible, expand on the small habit after a week or two and do it for just a few more minutes a day. 1. Just start working for 2 minutes on your most important task. I use this one at least one day every week. On some days I simply don’t feel like getting started with work . I’d much rather stay lazily on the sofa. So on such days I just start to work for 2 minutes on my most important task. That is the deal. The thing is: getting started is pretty much always the hardest part. After I have started moving and been at work for those 2 minutes it is usually pretty easy to just continue working on that task. 2. Review and appreciate your day at the end of it. If you do good things during the day and get things done then that can raise your self-esteem . If you reflect upon that you have done so that is. So take two minutes of the end of your workday. Appreciate what you did and what you thought. That is what I will do when I am done with this article and workday. 3. Set a low bar for happiness for the day. One thing I like to tell myself when I wake up in the morning is this: “Have a low bar for happiness today.” As I tell myself this and try to keep it in mind during the day I appreciate things more. The food, my work, the weather, the small events of the day becomes not everyday stuff but something I feel happy to have. The small or what may be something one takes for granted becomes something I now often pause for a moment or two to take in and appreciate. But if I become happier in my everyday life for the smaller things does that mean that I become unmotivated to keep working towards the bigger things? Nope. This way of looking at my life actually fuels me with more energy and inspiration, life becomes lighter and I feel less inner resistance as I explore and work towards both small and bigger things. 4. Breathe when stressed. When stress catches up with you, when you start to feel anxious, irritated and or fearful because of it then take 2 minutes. Sit down. Breathe through your nose and do it rather deeply with your belly. Focus on just for your breathing for those 2 minutes. Nothing else. This will calm your mind down and you can resume your work in a more focused and relaxed mood after that. 5. Open up your senses to what is here now. Pull yourself out of the past where you relive an old conflict and drag yourself further down a depressing spiral. Pull yourself out of the the future where you imagine a catastrophe at your next meeting, date or presentation. Place yourself and your attention on where you really are. Here and now. Do so by sitting down for 2 minutes. See what is right in front of you. Listen to the birds and cars outside. Feel the sun shining in through the window onto your clothes and skin. Sense the small draft from one of the windows. Be here fully with all your senses for those 2 minutes. This will relax your mind and body. Thinking will become easier. And an optimistic viewpoint will feel more natural . 6. When you feel the need to judge someone tap into understanding instead. When you feel the need to judge someone you know or may not know then take 2 minutes. Ask yourself these two questions: What parts of this person can I see in myself? How is he or she like me? Why do that instead of judging? Because no one wants to be judged in a negative way and doing so to the people in your life doesn't help to build good relationships. Plus, the amount you tend to judge others often tends to be how much you judge yourself too. So help yourself to live a more positive life in those two ways by pausing when feeling the need to judge and then choose something better. 7. Think for a minute and give someone a genuine compliment. Spend one minute on coming up with something you really and genuinely appreciate about someone in your life and that is in the same room as you at some point during the day. Spend the other minute or less on telling him or her the compliment. She or he will be happy. You’ll feel good about yourself and probably get some positive feelings too from the now happy and complimented person. It’s a good and small way to build more positive relationships . 8. Hug. It’s a small thing but physical intimacy can reduce stress and make us feel good. So spend 2 minutes of your day on hugging. Like compliments it can be a simple way to build warmer and more positive relationships with all kinds of people in your life. Just use your common sense before you start hugging. 9. Be interested instead of interesting. At the start of a conversation or to break the ice spend two minutes on asking one or a couple of questions about someone you are talking to and his or her life. Pay attention and don’t just wait for your turn to talk again. The interest you give will most likely be returned and you can start to build not only a good conversation but also a giving and fulfilling relationship for the two of you no matter what kind of relationship it may be. 10. Mix things up. Try the opposite… Have the vegetarian dish if you always go for the meat. Walk away from a stupid conflict instead of making it worse. Let one thing go if you often cling to things. Say yes to something spontaneous if you often say no and stick with your daily routine. Take 2 minutes or less in one common or negative situation in your life today, pause for a brief reflection and then make a decision that is uncommon for you. Make a habit of mixing things up to have more fun. To grow your life in small or bigger ways . To add unexpected experiences. To make it easier and simpler to step out of your comfort zone in general when you really need to. And to feel alive.

Do you ever find yourself dragging in the morning? Like your bed is just too warm and cozy to get out of and there just isn’t enough coffee in the world? I think we all feel that way sometimes. I certainly felt that way in the days of having newborns and being fully sleep deprived. But even now that we all sleep through the night (more or less), some days are just hard to get going. To help us all add a little pep to our step, a brand new Energizing Morning Pilates routine was just uploaded to The Balanced Life’s YouTube channel. Next time you’re feeling a little sluggish, try this powerful combo to boost your energy and start your day off on the right foot: Drink a big glass of water (bonus points: add some fresh squeezed lemon and sip through a straw) Complete this quick & energizing morning Pilates routine Write down 5 things that you’re grateful for. (bonus points: send a text to someone you love and tell them why you’re grateful for them.) Keep taking it one day at a time and remember, all of us here at The Balanced Life are in your corner and cheering you on. xo, Ready to BUILD STRENGTH & FEEL GOOD in just 15 minutes a day? Join the FREE 5-day Pilates Strong challenge! JOIN THE FREE CHALLENGE!

It’s Wednesday. And you may need some motivation to keep moving and to push and power through the last few days of this work week. So in this post I've put together 101 of the best and most powerful quotes on Wednesdays, on recharging your motivation and on keeping taking action to reach your goals for the week and step by step move closer to your biggest dreams too. I hope you’ll find something helpful and uplifting here. And if you need more motivation and inspiration then I recommend checking out this post filled with confidence quotes and this one with many, many quotes on change . Wednesday Quotes to Inspire and Motivate You “To some, it’s Hump Day. To us, it’s Wednesday’s getting its ass kicked and Thursday just asking Friday to switch places.” Dwayne Johnson “You don’t have to be great to start, but you have to start to be great.” Zig Ziglar “People rarely succeed unless they have fun in what they are doing.” Dale Carnegie “Wednesdays will always bring smiles for the second half of the week.” Anthony T. Hincks “Don’t judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds that you plant.” Robert Louis Stevenson “When a day that you happen to know is Wednesday starts off sounding like Sunday, there is something seriously wrong somewhere.” John Wyndham “What’s in a Wednesday? You! That’s who! Happy Wednesday. ” Anthony T. Hincks “Do not be embarrassed by your failures, learn from them and start again.” Richard Branson “Be miserable. Or motivate yourself. Whatever has to be done, it's always your choice.” Wayne Dyer “I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.” Michael Jordan “Success means doing the best we can with what we have. Success is the doing, not the getting; in the trying, not the triumph. Success is a personal standard, reaching for the highest that is in us, becoming all that we can be.” Zig Ziglar “Don’t let what you cannot do interfere with what you can do.” John R. Wooden “Wednesday: Halfway to the weekend! Enjoy your day!” Unknown “If I had eight hours to chop down a tree, I’d spend six hours sharpening my ax.” Abraham Lincoln “The man who moves a mountain begins by carrying away small stones.” Confucius “Keep Calm. It’s only Wednesday. We still have 2 more days to go.” Unknown “Wednesday is a day to help others celebrate life. You and only you are accountable for what you extend and give to others. One smile not only increases your value but it gives joy to each person you meet.” Byron Pulsifer “On Wednesday, when the sky is blue, and I have nothing else to do, I sometimes wonder if it’s true That who is what and what is who.” Winnie the Pooh “You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.” C.S. Lewis “One of the best pieces of advice I ever got was from a horse master. He told me to go slow to go fast. I think that applies to everything in life. We live as though there aren't enough hours in the day but if we do each thing calmly and carefully we will get it done quicker and with much less stress.” Viggo Mortensen “The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled. For it is only in such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are likely to step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers.” M. Scott Peck “Success seems to be connected with action. Successful people keep moving. They make mistakes, but they don’t quit .” Conrad Hilton “We can easily manage if we will only take, each day, the burden appointed to it. But the load will be too heavy for us if we carry yesterday’s burden over again today, and then add the burden of the morrow before we are required to bear it.” John Newton “Whether you think you can or think you can’t, you’re right.” Henry Ford “When a resolute young fellow steps up to the great bully, the world, and takes him boldly by the beard, he is often surprised to find it comes off in his hand, and that it was only tied on to scare away the timid adventurers.” Ralph Waldo Emerson “There is no traffic jam along the extra mile.” Roger Staubach Motivational Wednesday Morning Quotes “Morning is an important time of day, because how you spend your morning can often tell you what kind of day you are going to have.” Lemony Snicket “Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can.” Arthur Ashe “The secret of getting ahead is getting started. The secret of getting started is breaking your complex overwhelming tasks into small manageable tasks, and then starting on the first one.” Mark Twain “It does not matter how slowly you go, so long as you do not stop.” Confucius “Either you run the day or the day runs you.” Jim Rohn “Think of many things; do one.” Portuguese proverb “Now that your eyes are open, make the sun jealous with your burning passion to start the day. Make the sun jealous or stay in bed.” Malak El Halabi “Every morning brings new potential, but if you dwell on the misfortunes of the day before, you tend to overlook tremendous opportunities.” Harvey Mackay “You’ve got to get up every morning with determination if you’re going to go to bed with satisfaction.” George Horace Lorimer “Keep your eyes on the stars, and your feet on the ground.” Theodore Roosevelt “You will never plough a field if you only turn it over in your mind.” Irish Proverb “Your attitude, not your aptitude, will determine your altitude.” Zig Ziglar “Each morning we are born again. What we do today is what matters most.” Buddha ”Spend eighty percent of your time focusing on the opportunities of tomorrow rather than the problems of yesterday.” Brian Tracy “Just one small positive thought in the morning can change your whole day.” Dalai Lama “Work joyfully and peacefully, knowing that right thoughts and right efforts will inevitably bring about right results.” James Allen “Life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.” Lolly Daskal “Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see a shadow.” Helen Keller “If you don't design your own life plan, chances are you'll fall into someone else's plan. And guess what they have planned for you? Not much.” Jim Rohn “I was thinking one day and I realized that if I just had somebody behind me all the way to motivate me I could make a big difference. Nobody came along like that so I just became that person for myself.” Unknown “Keep on going, and the chances are that you will stumble on something, perhaps when you are least expecting it. I never heard of anyone ever stumbling on something sitting down.” Charles F. Kettering “We become what we think about.” Earl Nightingale “Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.” Maria Robinson “A year from now you may wish you had started today.” Karen Lamb Happy Wednesday Quotes “Happiness often sneaks in through a door you didn’t know you left open.” John Barrymore “Happy Wednesday! You are who you are; be happy with what you are called to do. Do not pretend to be like someone else for your gifts are unique to help lead you to the success as only you can define. Have a good day.” Byron Pulsifer “Happiness is an attitude. We either make ourselves miserable, or happy and strong. The amount of work is the same.” Carlos Castaneda “Gratitude is a vaccine, an antitoxin, and an antiseptic.” John Henry Jowett “The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own. You do not blame them on your mother, the ecology, or the president. You realize that you control your own destiny.” Albert Ellis “Optimism is a happiness magnet. If you stay positive, good things and good people will be drawn to you.” Mary Lou Retton “Thousands of candles can be lighted from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being shared.” Buddha “If thou wilt make a man happy, add not unto his riches but take away from his desires.” Epicurus “I believe compassion to be one of the few things we can practice that will bring immediate and long-term happiness to our lives.” Dalai Lama “We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have.” Frederick Keonig “If you are too busy to laugh, you are too busy.” Proverb “When one door of happiness closes, another opens, but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one that has been opened for us.” Helen Keller “Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.” Mahatma Gandhi “For most of life, nothing wonderful happens. If you don’t enjoy getting up and working and finishing your work and sitting down to a meal with family or friends, then the chances are you’re not going to be very happy. If someone bases his/her happiness on major events like a great job, huge amounts of money, a flawlessly happy marriage or a trip to Paris, that person isn’t going to be happy much of the time. If, on the other hand, happiness depends on a good breakfast, flowers in the yard, a drink or a nap, then we are more likely to live with quite a bit of happiness.” Andy Rooney “Happiness always looks small while you hold it in your hands, but let it go, and you learn at once how big and precious it is.” Maxim Gorky “If you want happiness for an hour — take a nap.' If you want happiness for a day — go fishing. If you want happiness for a year — inherit a fortune. If you want happiness for a lifetime — help someone else.” Chinese Proverb “The first recipe for happiness is: avoid too lengthy meditation on the past.” Andre Maurois “There is only one cause of unhappiness: the false beliefs you have in your head, beliefs so widespread, so commonly held, that it never occurs to you to question them.” Anthony de Mello “The pleasure which we most rarely experience gives us greatest delight.” Epictetus “The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain. Is not the cup that holds your wine the very cup that was burned in the potter’s oven? And is not the lute that soothes your spirit, the very wood that was hollowed with knives? When you are joyous, look deep into your heart and you shall find it is only that which has given you sorrow that is giving you joy. When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see in truth that you are weeping for that which has been your delight.” Kahlil Gibran “We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.” George Bernard Shaw “Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn’t arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I’m going to be happy in it.“ Groucho Marx “Plenty of people miss their share of happiness, not because they never found it, but because they didn’t stop to enjoy it.” William Feather “Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow. It only saps today of its joy.” Leo Buscaglia “Happiness consists of living each day as if it were the first day of your honeymoon and the last day of your vacation.” Leo Tolstoy Funny Wednesday Quotes “People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing – that’s why we recommend it daily.” Zig Ziglar “Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes.” Jack Handey “Every time you feel yourself being pulled into other people’s drama, repeat these word: Not my circus, not my monkeys.” Polish Proverb “A stockbroker urged me to buy a stock that would triple its value every year. I told him, ‘At my age, I don’t even buy green bananas.'” Claude Pepper “A failure is like fertilizer; it stinks to be sure, but it makes things grow faster in the future.” Denis Waitley “The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense.” Tom Clancy “You grow up the day you have your first real laugh at yourself.” Ethel Barrymore “I may be a living legend, but that sure don't help when I've got to change a flat tire.” Roy Orbison “When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.” Will Rogers “If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your trouble, you wouldn’t sit for a month.” Theodore Roosevelt “I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.” Groucho Marx “You can always tell when a man's well informed. His views are pretty much like your own.” H. Jackson Brown, Jr. “When I hear somebody sigh, ‘Life is hard,’ I am always tempted to ask, ‘Compared to what?'” Sydney J. Harris “Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?” George Carlin “I have noticed that even people who claim everything is pre­determined and that we can do nothing to change it look before they cross the road.” Stephen Hawking “Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.” Miles Kington “I saw a study that said speaking in front of a crowd is considered the number one fear of the average person. Number two was death. This means to the average person, if you have to be at a funeral, you would rather be in the casket than doing the eulogy.” Jerry Seinfeld “Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.” George Carlin “You know, some people say life is short and that you could get hit by a bus at any moment and that you have to live each day like it’s your last. Bullshit. Life is long. You’re probably not gonna get hit by a bus. And you’re gonna have to live with the choices you make for the next fifty years.” Chris Rock “Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.” Dale Carnegie “It’s always darkest before the dawn. So if you’re going to steal your neighbor’s newspaper, that’s the time to do it.” Navjot Singh Sidhu “A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.” Winston Churchill “Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing.” William James “Facebook just sounds like a drag, in my day seeing pictures of peoples vacations was considered a punishment.” Betty White “Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow Internet to see who they really are.” Will Ferrell

Whether you are looking for a delicious and simple recipe to make with the kiddos, a baked good to take to your neighbor, or a sweet treat to leave for the mail carrier, I have just the recipe for you! These peppermint chocolate chunk brownie cookies are so delicious and full of festive flavor this holiday season – perfect to enjoy yourself or for your gifting needs! 🙂 INGREDIENTS: 2 eggs  ½ cup pure maple syrup  ½ cup ghee, melted  ½ tsp peppermint extract 1 tsp pure vanilla extract 2 cups gluten-free all-purpose flour (like Bob’s Red Mills)  ½ cup cocoa powder  ½ tsp sea salt ¼ cup chocolate chips (like Enjoy Life Brand) Crushed naturally flavored peppermint candy canes for topping (optional: like Whole Foods 365 Brand)  INSTRUCTIONS: Start by preheating the oven to 350 degrees F and line a cookie tray with parchment paper. Add the eggs, pure maple syrup, melted ghee, peppermint, and vanilla extract to a large mixing bowl and mix well. Fold in the flour, cocoa powder, sea salt, and chocolate chips. Drop the cookie dough by the rounded tablespoon onto the parchment-lined baking sheet and bake for 12-15 minutes. Allow to cool and sprinkle with the peppermint candy, if using. Enjoy!  xo, PS – Looking for some more gift ideas? Check out our 2020 gift guide – full of ideas from TBL favorites to budget friendly options! Ready to finally stay consistent with exercise – even when you’re short on time & energy? Join me for the FREE Creating Healthy Routines Workshop & walk away with an exercise routine you can put into action immediately! I'M READY FOR THIS!

“I would maintain that thanks are the highest form of thought; and that gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder.” G.K. Chesterton “Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.” Robert Brault “Cultivate the habit of being grateful for every good thing that comes to you, and to give thanks continuously. And because all things have contributed to your advancement, you should include all things in your gratitude.” Ralph Waldo Emerson This week many of my readers will celebrate Thanksgiving. So I thought it would be a good time to share a handful of my favorite tips for making thankfulness a daily part of life. Because being thankful for what you have is one of the simplest and easiest ways to lift your mood. To give your motivation a jolt. And to live a happier life. No matter who you are or where you live in the world. 1. Pause and look around yourself. A simple first step to being more thankful is to pause during your day and ask yourself these two questions: What are 3 things I can be thankful for in my life today? Who are 3 people I can be thankful to have in my life and why? If you don’t come up with 3 people and 3 things each day then that is OK. One thing or person is great too. But if you can, try to not repeat yourself too often. Instead, think of more people and things to be grateful for to, day by day, expand your thankful view of your world. 2. Express your thankfulness. Don’t stop at just coming up with people for whom you are grateful to have in your life. Take a few seconds to tell them about it. This will make their lives happier. And as their faces light up with a smile you’ll feel happier too. Now, that gratitude could just be a small sentence. But it can have a big impact on someone’s day, week or even life. So be sure to make the small effort to express it. 3. Look towards yourself too. It is not only things that are important. Or other people. You are important and valuable too . So appreciate that. Ask yourself: What are 3 things I can be thankful for about myself? It could be that you were a good sister during a crisis last week. It could be that you finally got done with that boring or difficult task you had been procrastinating on. Your self-gratitude does not have to be all about achievements. You can simply be thankful for your good sense of humor. Or the help you give your friends and family by being a good listener from time to time. And the thankfulness doesn’t have to be about big things either. It could simply be about the fact that you floss for a couple of minutes in the morning. 4. Be thankful for the things you may take for granted. The things we get very used to having can become things we take for granted. But they are not things everyone in the world has access to. A few such things that I like to reflect upon and feel very thankful for having are: A roof over my head and a warm home. Plenty of drinkable water. That I don’t have to go hungry. Being able to enjoy the small and free pleasures of life. Access to the internet so that I can learn and connect with people. I have found that being grateful for things like these are especially helpful to zoom out and to put my situation in perspective when I am going through a tough time in life. 5. Start or end your day with thankfulness. To make thankfulness into a habit that sticks find a regular time for it in your day. For example, you can start your day in a good way by finding 3 things to be grateful for about yourself over breakfast. Or you can take a few minutes in the evening, just before going to bed, to use a journal to write down 3 things you are grateful for about your day. Try a tiny time commitment like one of these and see what impact it has on your life.

“It is never too late to be what you might have been.” George Eliot Getting started with doing what you deep down want to do in life can be hard. No matter if what you want is to start exercising, create your own business on the side , write a book, see other parts of the world, improve your relationship with yourself or something entirely else. But often we make getting started a lot harder than it needs to be by standing in our own way. So today I’d like to share 3 things you need to stop doing to step out of your own way and make it so much easier to actually get started instead of just keep dreaming about it. 1. Stop making it a huge and vague thing in your mind. The more you think about whatever you want to get started with the bigger it tends to become in your head. And as you keep thinking about the various ways this could go it tends to become scarier and scarier. So do this instead: Get knowledge from the others who have been where you want to go. To defuse vague fears about what could happen if you got started and about the unclear unknown, get information from people who have already gone where you want to go. It is easier than ever to find them today. Look them up online and read what they have written and said or send them an email. Or go ask someone you know in real life that has done what you want to do. Ask yourself: Honestly, what is realistically the worst that could happen? Take a couple of deep breaths to calm down your mind a bit. Then ask yourself this question. You’ll realize that in most cases the worst thing that could realistically happen is not that bad. It may sting for a bit. But it is something you can handle. And it is a situation you can find something to do about if this worst case scenario were to happen. The clarity you get from this question can – in my experience – reduce fears quite a bit. 2. Stop trying to control everything. Being prepared and knowing some things certainly helps. But it can become a trap when you try to control it all or think things through 50 times to be on the safe side and to not risk making mistakes, fail or look like a fool. What to do instead: Realize: you will stumble and that is OK. It happens to anyone who steps outside of his or her comfort zone. It has happened to everyone you may admire and who have lived a life that is inspiring. It is simply a part of a life well lived. And if you reflect on what you can learn from a mistake then that will be invaluable to help you grow and improve. Learn to set time-limits for small decisions at first. If you have trouble with overthinking then set a time-limit for when you have to make a decision. This might seem a bit scary though. So start small and set a 30-60 second time-limit when trying to decide if you are going to work out or reply to an email. Do that for a while and then move on to slightly bigger decisions. And then even bigger ones after that. 3. Stop thinking that you have to get started in a big and spectacular way. If you have a big goal or dream or even a medium sized one then it is easy to think that you have to take an action of the same size to get started or to get where you want to go. That is most often not true though. What to do instead: Go small. Just ask yourself: what is one small step I can take today to get the ball rolling with my goal/dream? Then take just that small action. And tomorrow or later on today you can do the same thing again. If that question still lands you in procrastination then ask yourself: What is one tiny step I can take to get the ball rolling? Single-task each little step. Focus on just the one step you are taking. Nothing else. Otherwise it is easy to get lost in thought, to go off track or to feel uncomfortable or fearful. So keep your attention on just this one action and step forward. And after that, the next one. Let these actions build day after day into something bigger. And before you know it you’ll have gone quite a distance on your journey.

Hi Beauties, Can you believe we are entering the holiday season? I’m not sure where the year went, but I’m happy to bring some joy to you today with our 2020 gift guides! You’ll find three different categories this year… TBL Favorites:  some of our team’s favorite things this year, including a few small businesses we love to support. Budget Friendly:  great options for gift exchanges, stocking stuffers, and those looking to save money. Kids + Babies:  healthy gift ideas for the little ones in your life. So without further ado, here are some gift ideas for your loved ones (or for your own wishlist) this year! TBL Team Favorites The Koop New York Candle : The W 66th St. scent is described as “walking through central park in the fall” – what else do you need? These candles are all handmade and smell amazing! Arizona Big Buckle Slide Sandal from Birkenstock Recipe Binder : Great place to store all our recipe central faves! The Feel Good Effect by Robyn Conley Downs Stott Pilates Express Mat : Extra thick mat that also rolls up for easy storage when you’re done with your at-home workout. Beautycounter Counter+ All Bright C Serum : A great item for treating yourself! Lace & Pearls Jewelry : beautiful, handmade earrings for your friends, sisters, mom. Everyone will love these! Athleta Rainier Tights : super comfortable and in a beautiful fall color Powersheets – TBL team loves Cultivate what Matters! The Balanced Life Sisterhood Membership : Give the gift of self-care this year with a Pilates membership! Kindle : helps reduce time spent scrolling social media at night, and you can also download a couple books the recipient would enjoy. Budget Friendly + Stocking Stuffers Old Navy Joggers : so comfy + affordable! KNC Beauty Eye Masks : Cute and functional? Sign us up! Grace over Guilt Mug (add a gift card to a local coffee shop!) Teavana Tea : Love these teas a for a warm + cozy stocking stuffer. Scrunchies : easy and affordable gift for anyone! Ilia Limitless Lash Mascara : incredible natural mascara for the beauty lover in your life! Cultivate what Matters Daily Planner Notepad Resistance Bands : Great stocking stuffer for at-home workouts Cocokind mymatcha all-over moisture stick : Treat dry skin anytime with this product. From lips to under-eyes! You’ve got what it takes keytag : for a daily dose of encouragement. Kids + Babies Kiwi Co : A TBL Team favorite and something for all ages to learn and have fun! Little Tikes Trampoline : Get out that energy even when the weather keeps you inside this winter! The World Needs who You Were Made to be by Joanna Gaines Stainless steel sippy cup with lid + straw : Perfect for smoothies! Colorfull: Celebrating the Colors God Gave Us by Dorena Williamson (she was also a guest on The Balanced Life Podcast !) Froggy Toss : Great for playing indoors or take to the park. Joyful Joyful Mug : For your littles to enjoy hot cocoa too! Magna-Tiles : Great for imaginations + easy to clean up. And, don’t forget! One of the best things you can give yourself this season is taking care of yourself so take a deep breath, relax those shoulders, and try to get on your mat today. Wishing you all a happy + healthy holiday season! xo, The Balanced Life Team PS – Buying a gift for a fellow Sisterhood member this year? Don’t forget to check out our TBL gear for some fun ideas they are sure to love! Get 3 FREE Pilates workouts in your inbox now! YES PLEASE!

Many of us struggle with the fear of the unknown. The anticipation of what would happen can often be daunting, and for those with anxiety, debilitating. Anxiety can often lead you into a spiral that you don’t know how to escape and while you may feel alone in this experience, you’re not. Today, Robin talks about her experience with anxiety and how she overcame it. She shares logical and easily applicable tactics to help you take control of your anxiety. If you want to learn how you can distance yourself from paralyzing thoughts, join Robin in today’s conversation. Show highlights: what you can look forward to in this episode! Robin shares her story with anxiety Adjustments Robin made to overcome anxiety Being proactive in day-to-day practices How Pilates heightens awareness and creates calmness The benefits of counseling and cognitive behavioral therapy Tactics to communicate anxiety to your loved ones Favorite verse on anxiety: Philippians 4:6-7 Links in this episode: The Balanced Life on Instagram 5-day Pilates Strong challenge Creating Healthy Routines Workshop The Balanced Life Sisterhood Share this podcast episode! Ready to finally stay consistent with exercise – even when you’re short on time & energy? Join me for the FREE Creating Healthy Routines Workshop & walk away with an exercise routine you can put into action immediately! I'M READY FOR THIS!

“Comparison is the death of joy.” Mark Twain “When you are content to be simply yourself and don't compare or compete, everybody will respect you.” Lao Tzu One of the most common and destructive daily habit is to constantly compare your life and yourself to other people and their lives. You compare cars, houses, jobs, shoes, money, relationships, social popularity and so on. And at the end of the day you pummel your self-esteem to the ground and you create a lot of negative feelings within. And perhaps also outside of yourself. So what can you do? How can you get a handle on this habit? Well, today I'd like to share 3 steps that have helped me to move away from this – it does take some time though so be patient with yourself – and towards a healthier outlook and view of myself and life. Step 1: Just realize that you can’t win if you compare yourself to others. Just consciously realizing this is helpful. No matter what you do you can pretty much always find someone else in the world that has more than you or is better than you at something. Yes, you may feel good for a while when you get a nicer car than your neighbor. But a week or two later you’ll see someone from the next block with an even finer car than yours. Step 2: Compare yourself to yourself. Instead of comparing yourself to other people create the habit of comparing yourself to yourself. See how much you have grown, what you have achieved and what progress you have made towards your goals . This habit has the benefit of creating gratitude, appreciation and kindness towards yourself as you observe how far you have come, the obstacles you have overcome and the good stuff you have done. You feel good about yourself without having to think less of other people. You can make this habit stick by for instance taking a few minutes each day or just each Sunday (or any day that fits you) to use a journal to write down how you have grown, how much closer you are to your dreams and goals now and what you have overcome and learned. By doing so your thinking will over time shift and your thought patterns will automatically become more focused on comparing you to you rather than to other people. Step 3: Be kinder towards other people. In my experience, the way you behave and think towards others seems to have a big effect on how you behave towards yourself and think about yourself. Judge and criticize people more and you tend to judge and criticize yourself more (often almost automatically). Be kinder to other people and help them and you tend to be kinder and more helpful to yourself. So focus your mind on helping people and being kind. Focus on the positive things in yourself and in the people around you. And appreciate what is positive in yourself and in others. This way you become more OK with yourself and the people in your world instead of ranking them and yourself in your mind. You are OK and so are they.

Being a working mom comes with an array of unique challenges. Breastfeeding on its own can be demanding, but mixing it with working-parent life can be a recipe for stress. Today’s guest, Kate Torgersen, knows exactly what this struggle is like, and that’s why she created Milk Stork. Milk Stork was birthed from Kate’s own working-parent struggles and she now uses it to help other working moms who are committed to breastfeeding. In this episode, she shares what it’s like for her to be a working mom, the challenges she’s faced this year, and tangible tips to make stress more manageable. Show highlights: what you can look forward to in this episode! Robin shares how she discovered Milk Stork What Kate’s current season of life looks like Kate’s career path and how Milk Stork started The way challenges shift throughout parenthood and seasons What chores Kate doesn’t do and how she balances them Defining “healthy” for yourself and how intermittent fasting has helped Kate feel her best What 2020 taught Kate about stress Finding healthy new rituals Links in this episode: Milk Stork Intro to intermittent Fasting Dyson Cordless Vacuum The Obesity Code The FREE 5-day Pilates Strong challenge Keep up with Kate! Kate on Instagram Milk Stork on Instagram Milk Stork on Facebook Share this podcast episode! Ready to finally stay consistent with exercise – even when you’re short on time & energy? Join me for the FREE Creating Healthy Routines Workshop & walk away with an exercise routine you can put into action immediately! I'M READY FOR THIS!

I sometimes write about how a good start to your day often leads to having a good day in general. A social, an energetic or a productive start sets the context for your day. But on some days you may not get a good start for some reason. Maybe you slept badly. Or the maybe grey skies and cold autumn rain is dragging your energy down. Or you might have lost that positive momentum during a hard first part of the day and after lunch you feel tired, low or lost in a somewhat sad or uninspired funk. What to do then? Is that day lost and should you just aim for a better day tomorrow? Well, today isn't over yet. Maybe you can still make something good out of it. Here’s how I do that by breaking the negative mood and getting a new start. 1. Appreciate what you have. The simplest of my most commonly used pick-me-ups. I take about 2 minutes and sit in silence. I tell myself: OK, I might not feel so good right now, but what can I be grateful for and appreciate in my life? I usually come up with one simple thing like: My tasty food. My health. That I have a roof over my head. That one thing opens up my mind. It redirects my thoughts from the negativity. Then I build upon that one thing. I make mental jumps from the roof, to the warmth in our home, to the clean water in the glass beside my computer, to that I can work from home as the rain pours outside. I make those small mental leaps by just moving my attention around in the room I am in. Like skipping from stone to stone over a stream. And I take the time to slowly appreciate all those things. This changes my mood to a happier, warmer and more open one. 2. Act as you would like to feel. Emotions work backwards too. So if I want to become more positive or enthusiastic then I act in the manner of a person who is positive or enthusiastic. I might not feel like it. But I do it as best as I can anyway. I may for example: Think of the task I have in front of me as something exciting and fun. Answer some emails or talk to someone in a positive and enthusiastic manner. Assume rapport if I feel unmotivated, negative or nervous before some kind of meeting (assuming rapport is to think to myself that I am meeting one of my best friends just before the meeting and that puts me in the right mood and headspace). 3. Think for a minute and give someone a genuine compliment. Here's a fun one I use quite often and that will not only lift my own mood. Spend 1 minute on coming up with something you really and genuinely appreciate about someone in your life that is in the same room as you at some point during the day. Then tell him or her the genuine compliment you have come up with. She or he will be happy. You’ll feel good about yourself and get positive feelings too from the now smiling, happy and complimented person. And so the mood for the both of you is changed for the better.

Hi friends! Could you use a little something to help you wind down, release tension, and let go of stress you’ve been carrying around in your body? I just uploaded a brand new workout to The Balanced Life’s YouTube channel and I think you’re going to love it… This routine will help you to release tension, breathe deeply, and also wind down your mind and body so you can set yourself up for a good night’s rest. Come back to this routine anytime you need to de-stress! CLICK HERE to view this workout directly on YouTube and make sure to subscribe and you’ll be notified of every new workout! Remember to take care of yourself this week. You’re worth it. xo, PS – Need a little extra self-care? Click here for 3 ways to calm your mind today. Ready to BUILD STRENGTH & FEEL GOOD in just 15 minutes a day? Join the FREE 5-day Pilates Strong challenge! JOIN THE FREE CHALLENGE!

With each day comes a new array of things to do, choices to make, and blessings to count. Today’s guest, Robyn Downs shares how she’s become “brilliant at the basics” and applied her systems to organize and prioritize her life. Robin Long and Robyn Downs discuss the benefits of “exercise snacking”, the inspiration for Robyn’s new book, and overcoming the pressure of the fitness and wellness industry. Join Robin in this episode full of tangible tips you can apply to your daily practices. Show highlights: what you can look forward to in this episode! What a day in the life looks like for Robyn The benefits of “exercise snacking” How Robyn had to shift her mental approach to wellness Robyn shares how she practices the 80/20 rule in her life How to make anchors of priorities and knowing when to stay no How to limit unnecessary decisions and decision fatigue How Robyn and her husband manage childcare  Why you shouldn’t try to take everything on alone How the wellness industry has put pressure on body image Links in this episode: Pilates Strength + Stress Relief Challenge The Balanced Life on Instagram Robyn’s Book: The Feel Good Effect: Reclaim Your Wellness by Finding Small Shifts that Create Big Change Beautycounter Counter+ Overnight Resurfacing Peel Primally Pure Plumping Serum Unlocking us with Brene Brown Podcast Keep up with Robyn! The Feel Good Effect Podcast Robyn’s Website @realfoodwholelife on Instagram Share this podcast episode! Ready to finally stay consistent with exercise – even when you’re short on time & energy? Join me for the FREE Creating Healthy Routines Workshop & walk away with an exercise routine you can put into action immediately! I'M READY FOR THIS!

Halloween is just around the corner, which means candy season is in full swing. The end of year holiday season brings a lot of sweets and treats, probably more than you encounter during the rest of the year. To help you be more mindful around sweet treats and sugar intake this time of year in order to nourish your body and feel your best, I wanted to share 3 simple strategies I come back to each year! And stay tuned till the end for a Spooktacular Halloween Snack Platter that’s full of healthy snacks, but is still festive and fun! 3 ways to survive the Halloween candy rush Don’t start the party early. Wait until the actual holiday to buy candy for your home. There’s no need to have it before then – unless you’re incredibly self-controlled and can trust that you won’t break open the bag before the trick-or-treaters arrive. On Halloween – eat the candy! One day of indulgence is not going to destroy your health, make you gain weight, or ruin all your hard work. One day is one day – it matters more what we do the other 364 days of the year. So, enjoy a day of holiday treats…guilt-free! Give it away. We all know what happens when we have bowls of leftover candy in the house, right? So, after the holiday, the best thing we can do to prevent forming a bad habit of late-night candy snacking is to get it out of the house. Donate the candy to a teacher to pass out in class or find a dental office that is hosting a give-back program. Spooktacular Halloween Snack Platter Ingredients: 2 oranges, peeled and sliced ¼-½ cup gluten-free pretzel sticks ½ cup Halloween chips or blue corn chips (you can find fun Halloween chips at stores like Whole Foods and Target!) ½ cup Terra chips A mix of red and green grapes 1 sliced apple ½ cup hummus of choice 3 gluten or grain-free tortillas cut into spooky shapes (Siete brand is great and if you don’t have Halloween cookie cutters, simply cut into triangles) Coconut or avocado oil for cooking Instructions: Start by adding the orange slices, pretzel sticks, Halloween chips, Terra chips, grapes, and apple slices to a platter. Add the hummus to a serving dish in the middle of the plate. Next, using cookie cutters, cut tortillas into Halloween shapes. Fry in coconut or avocado oil for 2-3 minutes or until crispy. Serve on the platter and dip in hummus. Enjoy as a fun Halloween snack that both kids and adults can enjoy! If you have any tips for how you deal with the holiday candy rush or nourishing snacks you make this time of year, I’d love to hear in the comments! xo, Ready to finally stay consistent with exercise – even when you’re short on time & energy? Join me for the FREE Creating Healthy Routines Workshop & walk away with an exercise routine you can put into action immediately! I'M READY FOR THIS!

“A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.” Winston Churchill “We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are.” Anais Nin One of the most common questions people ask me via email is how to become more of an optimist . So this week I'd simply like to share three habits that can help you to get started with that. I use these myself just about every day to stay optimistic in pretty much any situation. It may sometimes take a while before I find an optimistic thread of thought but these three habits usually help me to do it. 1. Ask yourself questions that let you see the optimistic viewpoint. When I’m in what seems like a negative situation my most common way of making something better out of that is to ask myself questions that promote optimism and helps me to find solutions. Questions like: What is one thing that is positive or good about this situation? What is one thing I can learn from this situation? What is one opportunity within this situation? These questions are not something that I can always use right away. Sometimes I need some time to process and accept the feelings and thoughts that arise. But after a bit of time, when those thoughts and feelings have mostly passed, I ask myself one or more of these questions. 2. Get optimistic support from the world around you. One of the most important factors if you want to be able to stay optimistic are the influences around you. Optimism is – just like enthusiasm – contagious. So find ways to create an environment that supports you. The people in your life. Try to spend more time with optimistic people and less time with people who seem to always be negative about things. Positive people will support you, add upbeat energy and can help you to find a constructive change in perspective when you have a situation that is bringing you down and when you are just making a mountain out of a molehill. The information you let into your mind. One of the easiest things you can do to create and support your own optimism is simply to regularly read blogs and books and listen to or watch recordings created by optimistic people. 3. Start your day in an optimism creating way. The way you start your day often sets the tone for the rest of it. A stress-free morning leads to less stress and better focus during your day. A work out early in your day leads to more energy throughout the day. And optimism while you are eating your cereal or traveling to work or school can help you to stay positive and constructive as you go through the ups and downs of your day. Three practical ways to get this good start is to: Read or watch something optimistic or funny for 10-20 minutes during your morning. Have an uplifting conversation over breakfast or early in your day. Listen to a motivating audiobook or podcast as you ride the bus, your bicycle or while you're walking somewhere.

As the world has slowed down over quarantine, we’ve all learned plenty of lessons. Whether those have to do with appreciation, relationships, time management, or health, it’s likely you’ve discovered things about your day-to-day life that you didn’t know before. In this episode, Robin shares a few of the top lessons she’s learned during quarantine. She shares ways she’s learned to manage her daily consumption of information, the importance of prioritizing your immune health, and how she’s gained a new appreciation for the little things. Join Robin in this episode to learn more about the lessons she’s learned and how they can help you. Show highlights: what you can look forward to in this episode! How the pandemic has highlighted the gift of digital connection How The Sisterhood has allowed for support and connection How Robin prioritizes the little things in day-to-day life Why who we listen to and what we consume on a daily basis matters The importance of good health and strong immune systems The value and importance of rhythm and routines Links in this episode: Creating Healthy Routines Workshop – sign up for free! Follow Robin on Instagram Share this podcast episode! Ready to finally stay consistent with exercise – even when you’re short on time & energy? Join me for the FREE Creating Healthy Routines Workshop & walk away with an exercise routine you can put into action immediately! I'M READY FOR THIS!

Looking for an effective, total body barre workout? Then you’ll love this Pilates-inspired Barre workout that incorporates light weights and exercises that will work your entire body. Feel free to come back to this workout anytime you’re looking for a routine that will work to strengthen, lengthen, and tone your muscles. Click here to watch this workout directly on YouTube! If you enjoyed this workout, let me know in the comments below! I’d love to hear from you. xo, PS – Have you been struggling to keep up with workouts? Click here for my best tips on how to break the streak of not working out. Ready to BUILD STRENGTH & FEEL GOOD in just 15 minutes a day? Join the FREE 5-day Pilates Strong challenge! JOIN THE FREE CHALLENGE!

“Very little is needed to make a happy life; it is all within yourself, in your way of thinking.” Marcus Aurelius “If you want happiness for an hour — take a nap. If you want happiness for a day — go fishing. If you want happiness for a year — inherit a fortune. If you want happiness for a lifetime — help someone else.” Chinese Proverb Saying no is often the easier way out. When you say no you can safely stay within your comfort zone. You don’t have to fear failing or being rejected . The scary unknown and sometimes difficult change can be avoided. But if you say yes your life can expand and deepen. The yes allows you to open up your life to more happiness. Today I would like to share 10 things that I have said yes to and that have helped me to become happier in my life. Pick one of these that resonate the most with you and focus on making it a part of your life. 1. Being imperfect. Trying to be perfect is setting the bar too high. It will be impossible to reach. And so you’ll lower your self-esteem . You may not feel very happy about how things are going in your life. Even though they might be going very well indeed. Perfectionism is mindset that eats at you and your happiness. Saying yes to being imperfect can turn that around. How to do it: Realize the costs of buying into myths of perfection. By watching too many movies, listening to too many songs and just taking in what the world is telling you it is very easy to be lulled into dreams of perfection. It sounds so good and wonderful and you want it. But in real life it clashes with reality and it can harm or possibly lead you to end relationships, jobs, projects etc. just because your expectations are out of this world. I find it very helpful to remind myself of this simple fact. Go for good enough. Aiming for perfection usually winds up in a project or something else very slowly or never being finished. So go for good enough instead. Don’t use it as an excuse to slack off. But simply realize that there is something called good enough and when you are there then you are finished with whatever you are doing. 2. Being you. Not being able to be yourself, always trying to change for others or censoring yourself don’t feel good at all. It makes life feel so small and limited. So how can you be yourself? Your environment plays a huge part. How to do it: Supportive people. Spend more time with the people who support your dreams, values and you. Or are at least neutral. And spend less time with people who always criticize you or you simply aren’t a good fit for. Supportive and life-expanding influences outside of your everyday life. Change your environment not only close to you. Go further and spend more time with sources of information that supports your dreams and can give you information that expands and makes your life happier and more exciting. Find support from people you have never met via books, movies, blogs, forums and music. And spend less time with negative and limiting influences. 3. The things that make you come alive. It is important to find some time and energy for the things that you feel makes you come alive. How to do it: Mix it up. Try something new, even if it is just something small each week. Eat the vegetarian dish at lunch if you always eat meat. Listen to some music that isn’t your normal cup of tea. Go out to a movie, café or pub with friends if you usually stay in at night. Or vice versa. Create variation and expand your comfort zone regularly in small ways to live a happier life. Reconnect with what you used to love if it has fallen by the wayside. If you used to go fishing, paint or play the guitar and it really made you come alive then reconnect. Use an hour for it this week and see if it still brings you joy and makes you come alive. 4. Optimism. Pessimism can really limit your life and bring it to a standstill . It can make it feel like there's no point in trying because it won’t make a difference or you’ll just fail. It can create ceilings and walls made out of glass where there really are none. Saying yes a more optimistic way of thinking can on the other hand open your life up . How to do it: Ask yourself optimistic questions. When you’re in what seems like a negative situation then make something better out of it by asking yourself questions that promote optimism and helps you to find solutions. Questions like: What is one thing that is positive or good about this situation? What is the opportunity within this situation? Start your day off on the right foot. As mentioned in tip #2, the influences in your life can make a huge difference. So choose to spend your breakfast time with an optimistic influence like for example a book, a blog or your mom. Or talk to someone early in the day that most often supports and cheers you up like a co-worker or a friend in school. 5. Turning negative self-talk around. It is very important to keep your motivation and your self-esteem up to live a happier life. Your inner critic may be one of biggest obstacles standing in your way of that. If you make a mistake or fail, if someone criticizes you or if you are just getting tired then that small inner voice can become louder and louder and drag and keep you down . It can tell you that you are stupid or lazy. That you will not succeed. That you are worse or uglier than someone else. Being able to turn the inner critic around or to shut it up as soon as it pops up is a very helpful skill. How to do it: Say stop. Simply create a stop word or stop-phrase that you say or shout in your mind whenever your critic pipes up with a distorted and self-esteem hurting thought. Say: Stop! Or: No, no, no, we are not going there again! Explain to yourself what this will lead to over the next year or more. As I mentioned in tip #1, reminding yourself of the cost of buying into myths of perfection is a powerful way to replace those thought habits. This works very well for other self-esteem hurting thought patterns too. Remind yourself of how the inner critic has shaped your life so far. And in your mind see the cost of letting it roam free for another year or five. 6. Saying no when you feel it is the right thing for you to do. To have the time and energy to say yes to the most important things you have to say no to some things too. How to do it: What do I truly want to focus my time and energy on? When you get an offer or an opportunity arises ask yourself this question. When you look over your schedule ask yourself this question. Think about and look at what your top priorities are and what you deep want before you say anything. Disarm and then state your need. It becomes easier for people to accept your no if you disarm them first. You could for example do that by honestly saying that you are flattered or that you appreciate the kind offer. Then you, for instance, add that you do not have the time for accepting and doing what they want. Or say that you do not feel that this offer is a good fit for your life right now. 7. Forgiveness. Not clinging to the past and to the hurt that is there but to let it go and look to the now and the future is an essential thing to find more happiness in your life. Forgiving is not always easy and can take time but there are some things that can make it a little easier. How to do it: Remind yourself that you forgive for your own benefit. As long as you don’t forgive someone you are linked to that person. Your thoughts will return to the person who wronged you and what he or she did over and over again. The emotional link between the two of you is so strong and inflicts much suffering in you and – as a result of your inner turmoil – most often in other people around you too. When you forgive you do not only release the other person. You set yourself free from all of that agony too. Make a habit of forgiving yourself. Do not just forgive others but also yourself. By forgiving yourself – instead of resenting yourself for something you did a week or 10 years ago – you make the habit of forgiveness more and more of a natural part of you. And so forgiving others becomes easier too. 8. Making someone else happy. Making someone else happier has many benefits. The happiness spreads back to you as you see his or her face light up and as you know you did the right thing. It spreads back to you as people have a strong tendency to want to give back when you have done something good for them. And it spreads out into the world as that now happier person may spread his or her happiness to other people. How to do it: Help out practically. Lend someone a hand when they are moving. Or give them a ride in your car. Or if they need information, try to find a solution by asking the people you know or via Google. Just listen. Sometime a friend or someone close to you may just want to vent or for someone to listen as he or she figures things out. It may not seem like much but it can be an immense help for someone who needs it. So be there fully – don’t sit there thinking about something else – and listen. 9. Openness and growth. Saying yes to being open to the good things in life and growing as a person plays a big role when it comes to happiness. The other things in this article will help you with that. But here are two more tips that will make your journey a little easier and simpler. How to do it: Change one thing at a time. Changing many things or your whole life at once sure sounds good. But willpower is something we often overestimate and everyday life tends to come in the way. So to make sure you have a much better chance of changing a habit or area of your life change just one thing at a time. Start small. Just say no to one small thing you don’t want to do this week. Or forgive one person for one thing. Or help and make someone happy in some small way. Take just one small step outside of your comfort zone . 10. To living your life fully despite setbacks. When things have been standing still for while or you hit a bump in the road then it's easy to back down. To shrink. To give in or give up. But a better way to say yes to happiness in those situations is to say yes to living your life fully. How to do it: Keep going. When you fail or make a mistake don’t give up . Reconnect with optimism by using the questions further up in this article. Find inspiration from books and blogs and the people around you. And don’t beat yourself up. Instead nudge yourself back on track again. Remember, it's not too late to change your life. I didn’t really try to improve my life very much until I was 25. And many throughout the world and history have made positive changes far later in life than that. So if you want to make a change then start today. Work with what you have where you are right now. Start small and take the first step towards something new.

Hi friends, Prior to the Pilates Strong challenge, I had an evening photo shoot on the beach. This is something I do regularly for upcoming workouts, challenges, and blog posts. And occasionally when I have a shoot coming up…the old thoughts start to creep in. Thoughts about how my body will look on camera, how much I have/have not been working out, where I’m at on my postpartum journey, what I should/shouldn’t eat the day of the shoot, etc. Years ago, when I lived in a place of constant dissatisfaction with my body (prior to starting The Balanced Life), these thoughts had power. They dictated my behavior, the way I felt about myself, and what I thought to be true. These days, they still try to creep back in on occasion – but the difference is, they no longer hold power over me. These days… I notice them, I acknowledge them, and I remind myself of my worth, my purpose, and what REALLY matters. And then I choose a different way of thinking. And then I choose a different way of thinking. I choose to appreciate and celebrate the body I have been given and show up, just as I am, to teach Pilates and encourage others to show up just as they are too. I share this to remind you that the journey towards freedom in body image doesn’t mean you won’t be tempted to go back to your old ways. When you believe negative thoughts or lies for years or decades, they are deeply ingrained and the process of rewiring our brain and changing our thoughts takes time. But it CAN be done and it is SO worth it. So as we head into a new season…let’s continue to notice those lies (the shape/size of our body does NOT define our health, worth, talent, etc.), stop them, and replace them with the truth: that our bodies are incredible gifts to care for, celebrate, and appreciate. Are you with me? xo, PS – If you want more on this subject and tips on shifting your self-narrative, check out this podcast episode:  You can’t change your habits until you change THIS . Ready to finally stay consistent with exercise – even when you’re short on time & energy? Join me for the FREE Creating Healthy Routines Workshop & walk away with an exercise routine you can put into action immediately! I'M READY FOR THIS!